I've got EVERYTHING

Sometimes I take for granted that my blog readers know what's going on in my life. I mean, if I post a few pics and get a few wall postings on Facebook and then just slam a picture of my daughter in a hospital room and call it "waiting for my ultrasound", one might think that I am the one waiting for the ultrasound or they may realize it is Ellie who is waiting but without an explanation...what will people think? So, my apologies for slapping a pic of my sweet girl. I'll give you the Cliff Notes version of the past week.

Derek had been out of town since Valentine's Day. He went to Boston for some corporate training and was due home on my birthday, Friday, February 26. I was careful not to blog or post about his absence just in case some serial stalker person were to read my blog or look at my Wall...just saying you can never be too careful.

Anyway, I'd like to say that we were managing pretty well while he was gone. Thanks to a few helpful friends and family to help me get kids from here to there, we were doing pretty good on our own. A week into my stint as a single mom (this past Monday) Ellie began running a fever. It was 100.7 then Tylenol took it down to the 98's when I put her to bed. I heard her fussing in her bassinet which is still in my room around 1 AM. I reached for her in her crib and she was blazing hot. Her cry was more like a whimper. I ran to her nursery and took her temp. When the thermometer reached 104 I began to freak...at 104.8 I thought I might pass out.

I dropped the thermometer and ran to get a dose of Tylenol. Then I reached for the phonebook to call the hospital but the listed number was WRONG. Dialed 411 and my mouth was so dry and I was so paralyzed by fear that it took me FOREVER to get the words "Habersham County Medical Center" out of my mouth. All I kept telling myself was that I was all that my little girl had right then and I had to do what I had to do to get her to the hospital. When I finally got in touch with a nurse at the hospital, she said to come right away.

I called my aunt and uncle and told them to meet me in the ER then I put Ellie in her carrier without even putting her diaper back on and then ran and literally dragged the boys out of bed. I kept telling them to run to the car because Ellie was very very sick. Looking back on that moment, I could cry. I was so scared, my three month old is blazing hot and whimpering a cry that I've never heard, and my little boys are being so brave after getting abruptly woken in the middle of the night. I did the only thing I could do- I prayed. I begged God for her life, then thanked him for the three months I had with her and acknowledged that she isn't really mine at all, but His. If he chose to take her now, then there was nothing I could do about it. I know that sounds so melodramatic, but I really thought she might not make it.

Once we were all in the car, we began what felt like one of the longest rides of my life. I kept telling the boys to talk to Ellie to make sure she was awake. How horrible for them to have to see their mother so gripped by fear.

We arrived at the ER and I ran in with Ellie, hoping the boys were following me. When I got to the waiting room, there was NO ONE THERE!!! Then a nurse came through the double doors pushing a patient in a wheel chair, not caring that I had a very sick infant in my arms. Finally, when Ellie started to make vomiting/choking sounds, I busted through the double doors yelling that my baby was choking and the nurse grabbed Ellie from me. I know. I know. I know that I looked like a freaky, insane and unstable mother, but I was SCARED TO DEATH.

Once the nurses started looking at her I remembered that the boys were in the waiting room. Another nurse went to get them for me and then it wasn't until I heard her say "get her some booties" did I realize not only was I not wearing any shoes, I didn't have socks on either! I didn't care.

When the boys and I were in the room, looking at Ellie, I looked over at Tate and he has these huge alligator tears running down his cheeks and says "she is the sickest baby ever". That's when I was glad they hadn't seen the freak out behind the double doors. I knew that I had to stay calm for my boys and reassure them that Ellie was going to be OK even though I really wasn't sure if she was.

Well, thank the Lord that our good friend Josh was the Dr. on call that night. He handled everything (and me) beautifully. They got the fever to go down, and after several tests including a cathatarization, they determined that she had a UTI. She was given a dose of rocepherin and a prescription for antibiotics. Ellie and I finally headed home around 4:30. (My aunt and Uncle had taken the boys home as soon as I was sure that Ellie was going to be OK)

What followed was around the clock Tylenol doses trying to bring down a 103 fever and finally an appointment with her pediatrician Wednesday. Because her fever had still not subsided, her pediatrician told me she needed to admit her. I had been anticipating this after speaking with one of my friends who had been through a similar experience with her daughter that involved a UTI. Our suspicion was Kidney reflux.

So I called Derek and told him to get a flight home and then I called my mom and asked her to meet me at Scottish Rite. After three days, IV antibiotics and several tests, Ellie is just fine. No Kidney reflux, no mysterious disease. It looks like an infection that just got out of hand.

SO many people prayed us through this one and I will be forever grateful. If you have a healthy child...you have EVERYTHING. Even in the scariest moments, I knew that God was in control and that He is my Creator and the Author of the story that is my life. He has a purpose for everything He sends our way.

Here are a few photos from our brief hospital stay...my brave little girl who never cried until the IV tape was taken off.

From 2010-02-25

From 2010_02_25

From 2010_02_25

Waiting for my ultrasound

Soul-stirring

Do you ever get the feeling that there is something stirring in your soul? Like God is trying to tell you to make a change or do something, but you have no idea what it is? I have that feeling and I can't shake it. Praying for clarity and to be open to His will in all that I do....

Workin' Woman

So I am in my 4th week of being officially "back to work". What does that look like for me? Well, to be honest it is THE MOST ideal situation, working for THE MOST incredible COMPANY!

My schedule:
In the office on Mondays & Tuesdays from 8:30-2:30 while one of my very best friends comes to my house wand watches Ellie and Britton. All of my other work is done from home.

Warning- Girlfriend talk ahead!
I am adamant about breastfeeding and keeping my milk supply up, so being away from Ellie for such a short period of time, I only have to pump once while I am away. I hook my little "milk machine" (as the boys call it) up to an outlet in the back seat of my van and 5 minutes later I am walking back into the office with 6 ounces of "mother's finest". Something about hooking up to the car makes the pump go crazy...instead of the wooo.......wooooo.....woooo it does at home, it is more like woowoowoowoowoo.

Anyhoo...
On "office days" when Derek is not here, I leave the house at 7:45, drop Tate off at school and then work until 2:30. When I get off, I go pick up Tate and am home by 3:00.

On "work from home days", Tate is in school of course and Britton attends The Little School from 8am - 12 pm. So Ellie and I pick Brit up at noon and then head back out again later in the afternoon to get Tate. As much as I hate getting Ellie out in the cold...she is with me all day Wed-Sun and I wouldn't trade it for the world.

The first few weeks were a bit rough. It is difficult to balance work/family/housekeeping duties, etc. but we are finally hitting a stride and settling into our new routine. I absolutely LOVE the work I am doing and need it as my creative outlet. I work for the most phenomenal women- Christians, and just plain old good-hearted friends. I am so very thankful to GOD for this opportunity to get out of the house, contribute to my family financially and to truly have a sense of "having it all". Never in a million years would I have guessed that I would have such an opportunity in a little ol' mountain town.

January 2010

Check out my new blog header!

I finally figured it out!!