The Mommy Wars

Oh, how I dislike that phrase. It is a phenomenon that does not necessarily find one mother pitted against another, but one mother pitted against herself. Mothers fall into basically 3 categories: SAHM, WAHM, WOTHM- no matter which mother you chose to be, I'd bet you have your fair share of guilt. As my boss always says- "When the baby comes out, the guilt comes in." I've definitely had that war within myself and after 7 months of actively trying to figure it out, I think I've finally found a place in life that I can minimize the guilt and make the most of my life as I raise my babies.
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My first 4 years as a mother were spent at home. I felt blessed to have the option to stay at home with my children- the days were filled with art projects, naps, home made lunches, lazy days on the couch, play dates, lunch with friends, play groups, forts in the living room, story time at the library, afternoons in the park...I could go on and on. I thought I was never going to work full time or even part time again. But, I must admit that even though my cup runneth over, I still felt like something was missing...like there must be something more.

I didn't face the fact that I wasn't 100% happy as a Stay At Home Mom until the possibility of a job came to my attention last July. It was basically my dream job- designing bags, coordinating photo shoots, creating marketing material and being a part of a Christian company that I believe is changing the world one woman at a time. But who would I be if I wasn't the typical SAHM, MOPS Coordinator and Preschool Teacher? Taking a leap of faith, I interviewed for the job, got hired and threw myself into my new status as a WOTHM.

The first weeks were exciting, refreshing and full of self re-discovery. My heart tugged at the thought of being away from my children all day, but my time with them was more precious than ever and more treasured. I went through an amazing experience that allowed me to remember who Merideth is- the person- not just the mother. The weeks turned to months and I found myself with an exciting career and happier than I've been in years.

In November our childcare situation changed and suddenly I found myself literally getting sick to my stomach on Sunday nights- the night before the work week would begin on Monday. I prayed and prayed that God would either confirm my decision to work or derail my plans and make it so that I had no choice but to leave my job. November and December passed with no resolve. The childcare situation wasn't getting any better, so finally in January I made the decision to approach my boss about going part time.

I honestly did not think that part time would be an option, but I knew that above all else I am a mother and wife first, and all the other titles fall well below. I went to my boss and laid my hear out on the table and told her what kind of situation would be the best for me and my family- part time work, M-TH 8:30-2:00, no Fridays. And against all odds in my book- she agreed to let me go part time!!

Today was my first day as a part time WOTHM and I have found myself literally holding my breath because I feel like all of this is too good to be true. I get to go to a fabulous job in the morning and them am there to pick up my kids as soon as school is over. I am so very thankful for this opportunity and I thank God every minute of the day that He has allowed this ideal situation to happen for me and my family.

As for the Mommy Wars- I believe that we, as mothers, do everything we can to make the best decision for our families. Motherhood is a sisterhood of women trying to figure it all out one day at a time- all the while trying to love our precious babies and provide them with the richest childhood imaginable. No matter what your acronym is- I bet that you are an amazing mother who is your own worst critic and I can almost promise you that your child or children think you're perfect!