What's your passion?

Almost 6 years ago the greatest dream for my life here on earth came true- I became a mother.  Before my bundle of baby boy joy arrived, this was the life I envisioned:
Being that I felt that it was my calling in life to be a stay-at-home mom, surely God would equip me to be an expert: Me, a nice outfit and a bit of make-up greeting my husband every evening with a kiss and a cooing baby in my arms.  "I'm so glad you're home", is what I'd say.  Dinner, of course, would have already been lovingly prepared and it would be sitting on the candle-lit table as soft, relaxing music played in the background.  Our home would be sparkling clean and clutter would be a thing of the past.  After all, I was going to be home ALL day and the only thing I would have to do would be to take care of this 7 pound precious- I'd have all the time in the world to create the "perfect home".

Uh....yeah right!  I have to admit that I was pretty devastated when the reality of a new baby combined with my general lack of "good housekeeping" skills collided into what was now my new reality.  The truth?  Sure, I greeted my husband every evening at the door...
...10 Nextel "direct connects" over the span of 5 minutes demanding "when will you be HOME???" later.  When he did arrive, there I'd be- sleep deprived, un-showered with knots in my hair, spit up all over me thrusting the colicky baby into his arms almost yelling "Good, your home- now it's YOUR TURN!"  As he looked at me bewildered, he'd take the baby and then navigate around all the baby "hunks of plastic junk" we'd managed to accumulate in a little under a month.  Trying to find a spot on the couch amongst piles of unfolded laundry and Parenting books and magazines I'd dog-eared in a desperate attempt to figure out this thing called "mothering".  And dinner?  HAH!  Isn't that what delivery is for?

I felt like a failure.  How could it be that God had called me to be at home with my child, yet I was fairing so miserably?  Alone in a new city without one person to go to for support, I spent months in despair.  Then my mom suggested that I attend a MOPS meeting.

MOPS?  What is that, I wondered?  She explained that it was a group for mothers just like me who primarily stayed at home with their children.   The group would probably be a source of support and friendship and a way for me to get connected with others in the community.  The best part?  It was a Christian group, so I knew that I would be among fellow believers.

So, I got on my computer, did a search on the Internet and contacted the Coordinator of the group that met closest to my house.  When I finally went to my first meeting, I almost cried with relief as I sat among many women who were in situations just like mine.  Some were seasoned mothers with brilliant advice and encouragement to give.  Others were new moms.  I remember one new mom in particular who was as scared as I was to drop her child off in MOPPETS.  We'd both secretly sneak back to the nursery in between breakfast and Discussion Group time to check on our babies- who were doing just fine without us, I might add.  It felt so good to know that other women were going through the same thing as I.  For the first time since pledging Phi Mu 7 years prior, I felt "At Home" in this group of new friends.

Fast Forward one and a half years and another baby later, I found myself in a new town yet again.  Without a MOPS group to attend, I formed a small playgroup with a few other moms from my church and community.  We were fairly organized with a schedule and a rotation of hostesses, but I wanted something more for my fellow mommy-friends.  I knew the friendship, encouragement and support that a MOPS group would offer and I wanted to share the MOPS experience with every "at home" mom I knew.  I began praying about starting a MOPS group.  Soon I would discover that when the Lord's will aligns with your heart's passion & desire...magic happens. 

I set out to find "someone" who would start a MOPS group, praying the God would deliver the perfect leader.  Someone with more biblical education than I; more connected in the community than I; someone braver & more confident than I.  However, when I found this statement during my MOPS research, I knew I'd found the person that was to start the first MOPS group in Habersham County.  "God does not call the equipped, he equips the called."  That statement along with knowing "With God, all things are possible", gave me the confidence to take charge of this new group that I felt the Lord was leading me to begin.

It wasn't always easy and I had to "scrounge" up people to be on the very first Steering Team.  ALL of whom I'd never met before, but found by word of mouth.  I would go over to each potential Steering Team member's house and pour my heart and vision for MOPS out to them on our very first meeting.  But the Lord moved mountains, gave us funding, found MOPS leaders and delivered us precious mothers to minister to.

Today, Habersham MOPS is 55 moms strong and growing and I could not be more thrilled to see the blessings that have been bestowed upon this group.  One of the greatest pleasures that I have taken away from MOPS is to watch ordinary moms turn into extraordinary leaders- pushing the limits of their comfort zones and stepping up to God's calling.  This year I will have the honor of assisting our newest MOPS Coordinator, Kimberly Chosewood.  During our conversations about the future I had to reassure her time and time again that no, I am not "called" to be the Coordinator right now but feel it is my place to stand in the background and let her and the rest of the Steering Team shine.  I cannot wait to watch Kimberly and the other Steering Team members grow closer to the Lord and become the Godly Leaders that He is equipping them to be.

Loving mothers is my passion and serving in this MOPS ministry is my reward.  I urge you to find your passion, your calling in this life because I promise you, there is no greater feeling that knowing that you are serving His people in His will.

What's your passion?  Share it with me in a comment attached to this post.

To find a MOPS group near you, visit: http:///www.mops.org

Even if I don't win...

...I've still won.

My Friend and fellow blogger, Laura told me about an article in a recent edition of the Northeast Georgian titled "Grandmother of the Year nominations sought".  So, being that I believe I have one of the most amazing grandmothers on the planet, I thought I'd nominate her.  Below is the essay and thank you to Laura bringing this to me as well as editing my essay!

My Grandmother is the closest thing to “Jesus here on earth” that I have ever seen. She’s spent a lifetime serving and loving His people with her hands and her heart; thus leaving a Christ-centered legacy to her four children, nine grandchildren and three great-grandchildren. The name on her driver’s license reads Joyce Abernethy Allison, but those closest to her simply call her “Gram.”

She loves to tell the story of how she got the name “Gram”. Being the oldest grandchild, I had the unique opportunity to choose her “Grandma” name. One day in those early years I came and asked her “Grandmamma, can I call you Gram, like the Graham cracker?” She’s been Gram ever since.

Gram treats everyone like family and will feed anyone who walks through her door. Her macaroni and cheese and tomato pie leave you wanting to visit again real soon. She walks three miles a day, cheers for the Atlanta Braves and always puts God first. It’s hard to believe there will be 80 candles on her birthday cake this December- I am amazed by how she is still so actively giving to everyone around her.

The first Sunday of every month you’ll find Gram rocking a baby in the nursery at Bethlehem Baptist Church. Then on Monday, she’ll be delivering “Meals on Wheels.” Every Wednesday she’s preparing takeout meals for Bethlehem’s Family Fellowship Supper, and the fourth Monday of the month, she’s serving up food and love at the Clarkesville Soup Kitchen. So you see it’s not just her family that Gram pours her heart and service into, it’s her community too.

But it’s much more than selfless acts of service that make her such an incredible grandmother. She’s the one person that I can always count on when I’m in need- not only letting me live with her when my husband was deployed to Iraq, but again four years later with a husband and two sons in tow as we built our first house. It is her heart, her unconditional love for all people and the way she not only reads the Bible every day; she lives it. So when I recently gave birth to my first daughter, I found it only fitting to name her Ellison “Joyce.”

Spring Science

We started two science experiments yesterday.
1: We caught a Caterpillar and we are hoping it will stay alive long enough to form a cocoon and turn into a butterfly. The caterpillar is fuzzy though, so it will probably end up being a moth. Brit named it "Shabby" and just had to draw a picture for him to look at while he is entrapped in our man made habitat.
2: Put a sweet potato in water. Wonder if it will grow roots???

Another mouth to feed...

...is JUST what we need, right?

We finally added a four-legged friend to our family.  Meet our German Short Hair Pointer, Rose:

From March & April 2010

Named by Tate, loved by us all...I think.  I am not a "dog person" or any type of animal person for that matter, but I think it is important for children, especially little boys, to grow up with a dog to love and care for.  She really is a sweet puppy and we've only had a few accidents in the house.  She's definatley added a little more action around here, as if we didn't have enough already.

At laaaaast

It's funny how life goes on whether you're blogging about it or not.  I've taken a hiatus from contributing to the blogosphere, but I am back and more committed than ever to recording stories, thoughts and pictures of my everyday life.  A lot has changed since my previous posts- numero uno being the fact that I have resigned from Initials, Inc. and am now a full-time stay at home mom.  This may come as a shock, considering my post about truly having "it all", but it turns out "all" isn't always best- especially when the quality of it "all" lessens, the more things I have my hands into.

Truth: three children, a home, a husband, a LIFE and a JOB were too much for me to juggle.  Now, I am back to where I need to be, concentrating on what matters most to me in the world- the living beings that reside within the 4 walls of my home.

Ahhhh....its good to be back!

I heart my birthday present

My friends Abigail & Andrea gave me these vinyl letters for my birthday. I put them in my foyer and I LOVE THEM!!! Thanks, girls!

Our Saturdays these Days

These days, we spend at least an hour at the ball park on Saturdays. Tate has been waiting to play ball for so long and now that he's finally old enough, he is loving every minute of it. And so are we. Derek is helping coach and my friend Joni and I are "dugout moms"...which means we will be helping the kids with the lineup- making sure they are ready and that they bat in order. Its a thrill a minute watching Tate have so much fun out there and watching Derek with all the kids.

Brit, Ellie and I stay behind the fence during practice...it has been hard on Brit though because he wants to be out there so bad. Derek makes sure that Brit has his own "practice" though. He will start soccer in the fall, we just felt like one kid, one sport, one season at a time was what will work best for us for now. Next year they can be on the same baseball team so that will work out great.

When it's cold outside...

mommy takes pictures inside

I've got EVERYTHING

Sometimes I take for granted that my blog readers know what's going on in my life. I mean, if I post a few pics and get a few wall postings on Facebook and then just slam a picture of my daughter in a hospital room and call it "waiting for my ultrasound", one might think that I am the one waiting for the ultrasound or they may realize it is Ellie who is waiting but without an explanation...what will people think? So, my apologies for slapping a pic of my sweet girl. I'll give you the Cliff Notes version of the past week.

Derek had been out of town since Valentine's Day. He went to Boston for some corporate training and was due home on my birthday, Friday, February 26. I was careful not to blog or post about his absence just in case some serial stalker person were to read my blog or look at my Wall...just saying you can never be too careful.

Anyway, I'd like to say that we were managing pretty well while he was gone. Thanks to a few helpful friends and family to help me get kids from here to there, we were doing pretty good on our own. A week into my stint as a single mom (this past Monday) Ellie began running a fever. It was 100.7 then Tylenol took it down to the 98's when I put her to bed. I heard her fussing in her bassinet which is still in my room around 1 AM. I reached for her in her crib and she was blazing hot. Her cry was more like a whimper. I ran to her nursery and took her temp. When the thermometer reached 104 I began to freak...at 104.8 I thought I might pass out.

I dropped the thermometer and ran to get a dose of Tylenol. Then I reached for the phonebook to call the hospital but the listed number was WRONG. Dialed 411 and my mouth was so dry and I was so paralyzed by fear that it took me FOREVER to get the words "Habersham County Medical Center" out of my mouth. All I kept telling myself was that I was all that my little girl had right then and I had to do what I had to do to get her to the hospital. When I finally got in touch with a nurse at the hospital, she said to come right away.

I called my aunt and uncle and told them to meet me in the ER then I put Ellie in her carrier without even putting her diaper back on and then ran and literally dragged the boys out of bed. I kept telling them to run to the car because Ellie was very very sick. Looking back on that moment, I could cry. I was so scared, my three month old is blazing hot and whimpering a cry that I've never heard, and my little boys are being so brave after getting abruptly woken in the middle of the night. I did the only thing I could do- I prayed. I begged God for her life, then thanked him for the three months I had with her and acknowledged that she isn't really mine at all, but His. If he chose to take her now, then there was nothing I could do about it. I know that sounds so melodramatic, but I really thought she might not make it.

Once we were all in the car, we began what felt like one of the longest rides of my life. I kept telling the boys to talk to Ellie to make sure she was awake. How horrible for them to have to see their mother so gripped by fear.

We arrived at the ER and I ran in with Ellie, hoping the boys were following me. When I got to the waiting room, there was NO ONE THERE!!! Then a nurse came through the double doors pushing a patient in a wheel chair, not caring that I had a very sick infant in my arms. Finally, when Ellie started to make vomiting/choking sounds, I busted through the double doors yelling that my baby was choking and the nurse grabbed Ellie from me. I know. I know. I know that I looked like a freaky, insane and unstable mother, but I was SCARED TO DEATH.

Once the nurses started looking at her I remembered that the boys were in the waiting room. Another nurse went to get them for me and then it wasn't until I heard her say "get her some booties" did I realize not only was I not wearing any shoes, I didn't have socks on either! I didn't care.

When the boys and I were in the room, looking at Ellie, I looked over at Tate and he has these huge alligator tears running down his cheeks and says "she is the sickest baby ever". That's when I was glad they hadn't seen the freak out behind the double doors. I knew that I had to stay calm for my boys and reassure them that Ellie was going to be OK even though I really wasn't sure if she was.

Well, thank the Lord that our good friend Josh was the Dr. on call that night. He handled everything (and me) beautifully. They got the fever to go down, and after several tests including a cathatarization, they determined that she had a UTI. She was given a dose of rocepherin and a prescription for antibiotics. Ellie and I finally headed home around 4:30. (My aunt and Uncle had taken the boys home as soon as I was sure that Ellie was going to be OK)

What followed was around the clock Tylenol doses trying to bring down a 103 fever and finally an appointment with her pediatrician Wednesday. Because her fever had still not subsided, her pediatrician told me she needed to admit her. I had been anticipating this after speaking with one of my friends who had been through a similar experience with her daughter that involved a UTI. Our suspicion was Kidney reflux.

So I called Derek and told him to get a flight home and then I called my mom and asked her to meet me at Scottish Rite. After three days, IV antibiotics and several tests, Ellie is just fine. No Kidney reflux, no mysterious disease. It looks like an infection that just got out of hand.

SO many people prayed us through this one and I will be forever grateful. If you have a healthy child...you have EVERYTHING. Even in the scariest moments, I knew that God was in control and that He is my Creator and the Author of the story that is my life. He has a purpose for everything He sends our way.

Here are a few photos from our brief hospital stay...my brave little girl who never cried until the IV tape was taken off.

From 2010-02-25

From 2010_02_25

From 2010_02_25

Waiting for my ultrasound

Soul-stirring

Do you ever get the feeling that there is something stirring in your soul? Like God is trying to tell you to make a change or do something, but you have no idea what it is? I have that feeling and I can't shake it. Praying for clarity and to be open to His will in all that I do....

Workin' Woman

So I am in my 4th week of being officially "back to work". What does that look like for me? Well, to be honest it is THE MOST ideal situation, working for THE MOST incredible COMPANY!

My schedule:
In the office on Mondays & Tuesdays from 8:30-2:30 while one of my very best friends comes to my house wand watches Ellie and Britton. All of my other work is done from home.

Warning- Girlfriend talk ahead!
I am adamant about breastfeeding and keeping my milk supply up, so being away from Ellie for such a short period of time, I only have to pump once while I am away. I hook my little "milk machine" (as the boys call it) up to an outlet in the back seat of my van and 5 minutes later I am walking back into the office with 6 ounces of "mother's finest". Something about hooking up to the car makes the pump go crazy...instead of the wooo.......wooooo.....woooo it does at home, it is more like woowoowoowoowoo.

Anyhoo...
On "office days" when Derek is not here, I leave the house at 7:45, drop Tate off at school and then work until 2:30. When I get off, I go pick up Tate and am home by 3:00.

On "work from home days", Tate is in school of course and Britton attends The Little School from 8am - 12 pm. So Ellie and I pick Brit up at noon and then head back out again later in the afternoon to get Tate. As much as I hate getting Ellie out in the cold...she is with me all day Wed-Sun and I wouldn't trade it for the world.

The first few weeks were a bit rough. It is difficult to balance work/family/housekeeping duties, etc. but we are finally hitting a stride and settling into our new routine. I absolutely LOVE the work I am doing and need it as my creative outlet. I work for the most phenomenal women- Christians, and just plain old good-hearted friends. I am so very thankful to GOD for this opportunity to get out of the house, contribute to my family financially and to truly have a sense of "having it all". Never in a million years would I have guessed that I would have such an opportunity in a little ol' mountain town.

January 2010

Check out my new blog header!

I finally figured it out!!

Ellie at two months

 

New Addition

OK, so a bonus room being finished is not technically a new addition, but it will feel like it once it is finished. Derek and I have spent the majority of 2010 working on the house. I have been cleaning, throwing out toys and trying to organize the papers of our life. Derek has been working vigilantly on finishing the bonus room. We intend to make it into a playroom for the kids which will hopefully mean keeping the "hunks of plastic junk" confined to one room in the house. I am blown away by how much he has been able to accomplish...and all on his own! So far he has done the wiring, insulation and sheet rock. Can't wait to see how this will turn out!

Just what I wanted!

Merry Christmas, yes it was.

All I want for Christmas is for nothing to change...

So I think my heart may explode into a million pieces at any moment. This little girl...this little family of five...this safe, warm house...this over abundance of blessings...my heart is filled to the brim with joy, love, peace and humility. Thank you, Jesus.


The newest member of our family was born on November 21 at 1:06 pm after seven minutes of pushing...will she always be this easy? My heart grew 10 times its size the day Ellison Joyce was born. Is it my age that makes me appreciate every little hair on her body, her tiny toes and her sweet grunting? Is it that she is a girl...born to be protected by her daddy and I? Is it that our family has a sense of completeness with this new bundle of joy? Whatever it is, I'll take it and I will treasure these moments of bliss forever.


6 lbs, 13 oz, 19 inches long and the sweetest little girl angel I've ever met...I wish that time could be frozen and that she wouldn't get a minute bigger. That her my finger would fit in the palm of her hand as she nurses, that her coos and grunts would be the soundtrack of my life. That her small eyes and tiny mouth would greet me every morning from here on after.


Oh, but they grow. And she is is the daughter of our Lord, lent to me for what will seem like a flash of time. I will be forever grateful to be the mother of a little girl and two precious boys. Not sure if Ellie will be the last, but I will treat each moment as if she is...treasuring, capturing and holding them close to my heart.


All four of us are head over heels in love with this little girl....

Bedrest- Day 1

I guess today will be considered my first full day of bedrest since the days before have been filled with Dr.'s appointments (yesterday we spent 6 hours at the hospital). I am now on Brethine every 4 hours instead of every six and can get out of the bed for 10 minutes of every hour. The Brethine makes me very shaky, HOT and thirsty- I guess it could be worse though.

My family is totally bailing me out with the kids, meals...everything and I am so very grateful. I've gotten all my bills paid today and was able to watch Good Morning America. Not sure what the rest of the day will hold, hopefully some visits from friends!

Thanks for all of the prayers and well wishes, I really appreciate everything. We are hoping to make it two more weeks before this little girl arrives.

Love to all of you!

Merideth