The Sleepy Years

Let's be honest here

2011-08-18T22:44:00.000-05:00

http://mbsfromthehip.blogspot.com/2011/08/lets-be-honest-here.html

2011-07-23T23:48:00.002-05:00

Source: prettystuff.tumblr.com via N on Pinterest

Something Changed by Sara Groves

2011-02-10T13:33:00.000-05:00

because i'm just not sleepy anymore...

2011-01-15T15:54:00.000-05:00

check out my NEW blog!

all posts from here on out will appear HERE. please update my address on your blogroll. thanks!

1.11.11

2011-01-11T22:40:00.001-05:00

SNOW DAYS

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Rubbermaid box tops make great sleds

makeover madness

2011-01-04T01:30:00.000-05:00

Well, as you can see, my blog is getting a makeover. I won't tell you the hours I've spent creating layouts, design elements, and just getting way too excited about all the possibilities out there. I still have a ways to go until I get it "just so". And then, when it's ready, you'll find it under a new address as well.

what's up with us lately?

Dragging our feet about starting back to school tomorrow...um, well, today. I just love having my whole family under one roof. Love staying in PJ's all day and having no outside obligations. This was the best Christmas and winter break I have ever had. Once I step away from all of this blog designing madness, I'll catch you up for real.

Praise be to God for His bountiful blessings!

MY BLOG IS UNDER CONSTRUCTION

2011-01-02T16:49:00.002-05:00

pardon the mess...

Every life is a living, breathing, beautiful work of art.

2010-12-06T21:39:00.000-05:00

When you capture moments that make life beautiful, you want to hold onto them forever. Sometimes you want to share those moments with loved ones…sometimes you want to share them with the WORLD! Shutterfly helps you do all of this and more.
I’ve been using Shutterfly for my prints, birthday invitations, books and online photo storage for years now. What I love most about Shutterfly is that it not only gives you a safe and secure place to store your digital photos, it also helps you present them as beautiful works of art. When my daughter was born last year, Shutterfly was my “go-to” for unbelievably gorgeous birth announcements. When we went to the beach this summer, I uploaded my digital pictures to Shutterfly each night so I knew that they would be safe in my online gallery. When I got home, all I had to do was pop them into an album using Shutterfly’s publishing service and my book was made in no time. Not to mention shipped to me within 25 hours…wow!

This Christmas, I am searching for the perfect Christmas card from Shutterfly’s 2010 holiday collection that captures our favorite memories of 2010. I found this one and imagined choosing some less traditional photos of our children- you know the ones- the crazy, silly little moments of life that wouldn’t qualify as wall portraiture, but give you an honest glimpse of everyday life in our household. This one, with its retro flavor, yet classic design would look fabulous on any mantle. Finally, there is this one, which I am most excited about because you can take complete control of the creativity and design a truly one-of-a-kind card.

I absolutely LOVE receiving Christmas cards with photos, so much that a few years ago I started showcasing each photo Christmas card we receive in our Christmas tree. Yep, right next to my great-grandmother’s hand crochet snowflake, you may find the face of a friend I’ve known since I was a child; relatives I only see once a year twinkle in the lights and sit on branches among other cards from dear friends and family. When Christmas is over, I keep all of the cards and am hoping to begin a fun project where I place all of the cards into an album each year.

I am not sure which card I will choose yet but I know that whichever one I do decide to commemorate 2010 with, I know it will be a beautiful, high-quality work of art that I will treasure forever thanks to Shutterfly.

The Performing Arts of the season

2010-12-02T19:50:00.000-05:00

If "all the world's a stage", then my first born will do just fine. He was so excited to announce last week that he would be singing "ON STAGE, MOM!" at his Christmas performance at school. I could not wait to see him and his little first grade buddies dance and sing to "Up on the Rooftop" tonight. It was short and sweet but he was proud nonetheless. We were even surprised with a rare weeknight visit from "GG" which made tonight all the more special. Great job, son!

"Yeah, I'm a Rock Star!"

"...click, click, click."

Special night with a special lady!

He's Here!

2010-12-01T22:12:00.000-05:00

Elfie arrived at our house today. (yes, my children were so very fabulously creative and original when they chose a name for our little elf last year)

He showed up with a kid-friendly Christmas Tree, all of our kid-friendly ornaments, our library of Christmas books, seasonal stuffed animals, presents for each child (new holiday pajamas), a special Hallmark recordable story book and a handwritten letter reminding my little sugar plums what Christmas is all about.

Tate LOVED the books, Brit was excited about getting to decorate the tree and all Ellie cared about was climbing the stairs. It was fun to see their faces but even more fun to re-emphasize that ALL OF THIS is because of a Baby born in a manger, sent to save the world.

Merry Christmas my friends, may you cherish every minute of this magical season and bask in the Glory of the true meaning of it all.

The typical "portrait pose" with their new pajamas on.

Christmas favorites, old and new.

Elfie, himself.

December Daily- Blog Style

2010-12-01T21:41:00.000-05:00

I have an extremley ambitious and creative friend who makes these fabulous December Daily scrapbooks for she and her husband. Although I admire her little treasures of Decembers past and present, and love to hear the progress she is making with her 2010 album, my December Daily will be kept here, in the blogosphere. Out here, no one will eat my mini glue dots, make confetti with the christmas tree shaped hole puncher or get tangled in spools of beautiful ribbon.

"My cullahs are Blush and Bashful" ..."Her colors are PINK and PINK!"

2010-11-29T22:41:00.000-05:00

So, I guess this is what happens when the mother of two boys gets to celebrate her daughter's first birthday...

My one wish for my girl on her special day, was to be surrounded in love. My wish came true.

Thanks to Marty, Mom and Gram for help with the cooking; Dad, Sandy, Nana & Grandpa Ed for travelling so far, Missy & Kristin for making the last-minute cake, Abigail for capturing the moments, Derek for helping me cross of my list and to everyone who came to celebrate with us. I could not think of a better way to cap off the first year of Ellie's life. THANK YOU!

PS: We all know that the party for a One year old is really for the mom...so THANK YOU ALL for indulging me! Oh, and alas...my favorite pic of the day...

5 till One- Birthday Countdown

2010-11-17T20:31:00.001-05:00

Dear Children-

I began this post as a letter to Ellie 5 days before her birthday, but all of these apply to all of you. Here are 5 little nuggets of advice from your mother:

1. Get to know your Maker. And by Maker, I mean the one and only Jesus Christ, Lord and Savior. As much as your dad and I want to be your "everything", even we cannot love you and be there for you like Jesus can. It is inevitable- everyone you know will eventually, at some point let you down. God will not. I promise that I will show Him to you in every way that I can.

2. Stick with it. Never quit. Never give up. I am referring to marriage here, honey. Your dad and I don't know what it is like to have parents that are still married, but we'd both probably say that is the one thing in our lives that we long for no matter how old we get. Some people may make marriage look easy all the time- and maybe for them it is. For the rest of us, however, marriage can be tough. The absolute best advice on marriage that I can give you is to love, unconditionally, no matter what. In the best of times, marriage will be fun, exciting and easy. But in the hard times remember this: Love your spouse through the eyes of God completely unselfishly. Seek the good in your spouse and honor the commitment you made. Always.

3. To have a friend, be a friend. Be the friend you want to have. Take the risk, share your heart, be OK with being vulnerable and open. True "heart/sister/brother friends" are more valuable than gold. Unlike family who you don't choose, friends become your friends because you WANT them to be. Guard your heart and use discretion when choosing your friends. But, when you do discover that a person is worthy of your love and friendship- give your heart freely to them and love them unconditionally. Should a problem arise between you and a heart/sister/brother friend- approach, talk it out and move on. Chances are you will be closer afterward.

4. Tithe. I cannot even begin to tell you how important this one is. EVERYTHING you have comes from God, we owe HIM everything, so please, at the very least, give back to Him what is biblically required. Give joyfully and with thanksgiving. I promise you that the Lord rewards the faithful. And while we are on the subject of giving...give your time, your talents, your resources to those in need. You will think it is you who is giving, but in the end, you will be the one walking away with the greatest reward.

5. Write, record, type, photograph...document your life and the life of your family. You won't ever regret anything you do to capture your history and the history of your spouse and children. You will enjoy looking back to see where you've been, what you've looked like and reflecting on God's blessings in your life.

Well, there you have it. 5 little pieces of advice from me among thousands that I will probably give you in your lifetime.

WHAT YOU'RE DOING NOW:
Tate: Accidentally just slung toothpaste all over Brit.
Brit: Crying about being covered in toothpaste.
Ellie: Sleeping peacefully in your crib.
Dad: In Michigan oblivious to it all. :-)

6 till one- Birthday Countdown

2010-11-16T21:44:00.000-05:00

Believe it or not, you share the same birth month with 6 other VERY SPECIAL PEOPLE
Carole Ann Vansant Everett- family
Brooks Owen York- friend
Brooks Bowman Ray- friend
Jack Garrett- friend
Tommy "Papa" Shaw- family
Nancy Dolph- family

What you're doing now:
Tonight you are crying out in your crib intermittently...just so you know, carrots give you gas. sorry for that. will wait a few more months to try those orange trouble makers again.

7 till One - Birthday Countdown

2010-11-15T20:38:00.000-05:00

In seven days my baby will be one year old. Here's seven memories of my girl:

1. When I found out I was expecting you I did what I always do when I am expecting a baby- I went out and bought a journal so that I could write down my thoughts and my memories of you. The color of journal I chose? Pink. Do you think I knew?

2. When the ultrasound technician so rudely proclaimed "girl", I almost hyperventilated- she could barley keep the sonogram wand on my belly because of my sobs. I stared at the monitor in disbelief and to this day I cannot believe I was blessed with you. My girlfriends threw me a "pink party" that night to celebrate with a mom who had two times been blessed with boys...but finally got her girl.

3. The first thing I said to you when I saw you was "she looks like Tate!". Guess that wasn't poetic or particularly memorable, but I wasn't expecting you to look like that...or have THAT MUCH hair!

4. I've used a hair dryer on you since the day you were born...and a comb.

5. I let you sleep with me for your first 4 months of life. I know that is awful, but I couldn't help it. Our room was SO COLD and you were SO LITTLE. I loved that special time with you.

6. In those early days, you were SO SLEEPY! I remember fretting over you and praying that you would be OK. I would hold you in front of the window so your yellow skin could drink in the sunshine.

7. I almost let you drown when you were about two weeks old. I was bathing you and you got really slippery and soapy water got all over your mouth and you were breathing in the soap bubbles and I thought I might have a heart attack. But you survived...and I did too...barely.

On this day...

2010-11-12T06:47:00.001-05:00

Today I lift up a friend who has been where no mother ever wants to go.
On this day, two years ago, she gave birth to an angel who went to be with Jesus before his mama ever even saw his face.

We held that mama, we loved her, we cooked for her, we grieved with her, we were there when she laid her baby to rest. But we don't walk in her shoes, we don't see through her eyes we don't hurt with her heart.

I draw strength from her strength and the way she only ever looked to the Lord for comfort and for peace. I remember being afraid to tell this friend that I was expecting another baby just a few months after losing hers, but oh how she rejoiced with me. It was then that I began to understand the love and strength of a Christ-filled heart of a true friend.

And on this day, her newest miracle will be on the operating table. We all pray for strength for that baby, for the doctors' hands to be steady and minds to be clear. For peace and patience as the mama waits...and prays...and prays...and waits...until she can hold her baby again.

God Bless you, my friend.

snapshots

2010-11-09T19:36:00.001-05:00

Uh-oh!

2010-11-07T22:47:00.000-05:00

First there was "ma ma", followed by "da da" (which has three meanings- daddy, dog & bye bye) and today it was "uh-oh" as you dropped your cup over and over and over again saying "uh-oh" each time and laughing at how fun this new game of yours is. Not sure if it is considered a word or a phrase, but either way, you are hilarious and you entertained all four of us today.

First Born Friday

2010-11-05T16:38:00.000-05:00

My first born in a word: heart

because...

the first experience i had when i knew mine was no longer beating in my chest, but bundled up in a blue blanket early one june morning in 2004

because...

i've never seen a man lose his for another like the way your daddy did for you when he followed you to the NICU

because...

you wear it on your sleeve

because...

you say it might explode because "the most beautiful two girls in the whole world live in this house"

because...

mine breaks when yours does

because...

Jesus lives in yours and you both live in mine

First Borns, Middles and Sisters

2010-10-25T21:31:00.000-05:00

Usually when I don't blog it is because I have SO MUCH to blog about, that I don't know where to start. Taking inspiration from a friend or two, I am committing to at least three posts a week: Middle Child Monday, First Born Friday and Sister Saturday. These posts will be dedicated to Brit, Tate & Ellie respectively. Trying to keep it simple as to not overwhelm myself. Also, since it is a rare occasion these days that I pick up a pen to write in the journals that I've kept for each of my children since their births, this will be another attempt to document their lives. and mine.

So we begin with Middle Child Monday and I will sum up Britton David in one word: Silly. See ABOVE..wouldn't you agree?

Don't feel left out, B...all the other ones are getting one word this week as well. More about all of my babies next week.

Eleven at 11

2010-10-21T12:02:00.000-05:00

I realized as soon as I posted the Top 10 at 10, there were a few things I forgot to mention, so we'll just add them here. Again, in no particular order, here are 11 things about my girl at 11 months of age:
1. You traded in your paci for your arm. Looks like you have permanent burns/hickeys right next to your wrists.
2. You DANCE! I love to watch you move.
3. You can stand on your own, but quickly sit as soon as you catch yourself doing it.
4. You LOVE your bath. I knew you took after me.
5. So thankful that you will let just about anyone hold you. I know you love me but it gives me comfort to know that without me, you are still ok.
6. You save your deepest belly laughs for your brothers. Oh, how they make you smile.
7. We call you Ewa, baby Squirrel, Squirrely Girl, Smells, Rusco, and Bells to name a few.
8. You pitched your first fit on October 20th, 2010. Hope it's not a taste of things to come.
9. You started waking up between 2 & 3 am...EVERY NIGHT for the past week. I try to ignore you and usually can for about 30 minutes, but you don't give up until you get a visit from mom and dad. (I see that smile, April!)
10. Guess how many times I've been truly frustrated with you in the past 11 months? ONCE! Same for your dad...just once...he SOOOO obviously adores you.
11. I'm still your favorite!

I don't ever want to forget this day

2010-10-14T12:47:00.000-05:00

Dear Ellison,

I wish that I could tell you that today's discovery would be something that you will rarely experience in your life- but I can't lie to you. What you did today, with such curiosity and gusto, will not always feel like such a Disneyland adventure. It won't be fun, you won't ever get a medal for it, no one will die if you DON'T do it, and chances are it will never be something you look forward to. Ellison, today you discovered LAUNDRY.

I can't promise that you may not one day find yourself angry at the very person who's boxer briefs you are holding in your hand, or that you won't be irritated by the 15th grass/ketchup/sharpie stain you find on your schoolager's Sunday best, or dumbfounded at the sheer volume of burp cloths and onesies have accumulated in a day. I can't promise it will ever be easy or exciting or fun.

But I promise you this:
One day you will pray over that pair of undies and thank God for the man who wears them. You will gasp when you think how much that schoolager has grown and how it has become increasingly difficult to decipher "who's is who's" because they are all just getting so big. One day you will fold a onesie or a burp cloth or a fuzzy little sock for the very last time. And then it will hit you. You've spent the last (however many) years taking care of your family- from the food on the table to the clothes folded neatly and placed in a drawer. You've loved them, prayed for them, held them and have simply been there for them. Then you will know that no task- great or small- is a burden or a chore as long as it is done in love.

Delight in the little things, my love. Cherish the path that the Lord has given you. Rejoice and seek God's face in all you do.

Oh, and bleach for your whites, cold for your colors, and don't let anyone ever tell you that liquid fabric softener is a splurge.

I love you,
Mama

Top Ten at 10

2010-10-11T19:49:00.000-05:00

Ellie is almost 11 months, but I've had this post in my head since her 10 month birthday. Here are the Top Ten (in no particular order) things that came to mind on September 21st:
1. Her first pearly white pops through her bottom gum
2. Says mama to me and dada to the dog...and Derek
3. Holds the phone up to her ear as if to say "hello"
4. Waves "Bye Bye"
5. Stands on her own
6. Belly laughs at her silly brothers
7. Goes to bed at 6pm....wakes up at 7 or 8 am
8. Eats a blueberry waffle every morning for breakfast
9. I FINALLY let her eat Cheerios and WHOLE Puffs
10. She reaches for me, hugs me, kisses me and LOVES ME

I love, love, love this little girl!

September Mourn

2010-09-23T09:15:00.001-05:00

OK, so I am sure that wasn't exactly the way Neil Diamond intended it when he penned the lyrics to his 1986 hit, but as I was packing away all of my summer fashions- white pants, white shoes, sun dresses, swimsuits, summer purses and accessories, I found it surprisingly difficult to pack away these:

My beloved white sunglasses. I think I bought them at TJ Maxx or maybe Marshall's for like, 9 bucks...but oh, they are worth so much more than that to me. Whenever I put them on a feel young, fashionable and...well almost frisky! I can't explain why they have this effect on me but they do. As I pack them away, I feel like I am packing a part of me that has been buried beneath breastfeeding, booty-wiping, sippy cup filling, boo boo kissing and all the other makings of motherhood for the past 6 and 1/2 years. I really can be fun, spontaneous and full of laughter...I promise. So, as I pack these away I am going to make an effort to never lose myself again...to be the "me" that I truly am and not just the "me" that I think I am supposed to be. Oh, and I have an appointment with one of my besties to go shopping tomorrow...TJ Maxx and Marshall's is definitely on the "hit list". Here's hoping I'll come home with a little (new) piece of me!

"Look at what you've done

Why, you've become a grown-up girl"

-September Morn, Neil Diamond

Ellie at 9 months

2010-09-11T20:53:00.000-05:00

Boochie, Roni, Bitzer & Ewie

2010-09-10T11:56:00.000-05:00

If you know our family well, you know that we come up with all kinds of crazy nicknames for each other. For starters, Derek and I have called each other "Boochie" since...well, I cannot even remember when or why or who started it. When Tate was born he was Tater, Tate Mouse, Mitter and apparently "Boochie" seemed appropriate for him as well as the two children that would come after him. Now we call him Tony or Roni or Tate-opolis. Then there is Brit who was Bit, Bitzy, Bitzer, Bitzerpotomus, Bellus. So here is Ellie and we call her bellie, smellie, Ewie, Petunia, Belles. Even our dog, Rose has nicknames: Rosetta Stone, Rosa Barks and Rouge (like, what your grandma calls the pink stuff she powders on her cheeks)...usually said at an ear-splitting volume ROUGE!!!!!!

But we don't limit ourselves to the monikers (thank you, Laura) listed above. Just yesterday Derek called me corn chip and fuzzy Popsicle. Its kinda fun to just call someone whatever comes to mind at the moment. It keeps life interesting and definitely keeps us laughing. Oh, and don't worry, chances are we have a name for YOU as well...you just don't know what it is...and we'll never tell!

Finally his first

2010-09-07T22:26:00.000-05:00

After several seasons of sitting on the sidelines watching his brother play sports, Britton is finally old enough to join a team of his own. He had his very first soccer practice tonight and he loved it. I expected him to do well, and he did. I hope it gives him more of his own identity since Tate decided not to play this year (regrettably so, as you can see in the picture). I am excited to be able to see Brit run and play and hopefully do well during his first team sports experience.

While practice was going on, I couldn't help but take a few snapshots of Kristin's baby...what a love!

From Collages

up to and into

2010-09-06T20:49:00.000-05:00

Ellie was 9 months old on August 21st, and I must say that she "grew up" more in one month than she had in the last 8. She went from happily sitting and observing to actively exploring her world. She's UP TO 16 1/2 pounds and INTO just about everything!

Busted!

Her favorite indulgence right now is her brother's marker collection. As soon as she sees the pantry doors open, she scurries over to discover what markers look like, feel like and taste like.

She also loves my cookbooks. She can occupy herself for a good 15-20 minutes pulling them all off the shelves in the kitchen making this funny little new laugh that I MUST capture on video soon.

Ellie has also discovered that it's OK if she does not like a particular food, because Rose will eat just about anything. I've caught her tossing pieces of veget ables and bread to our four-legged friend. Rose LOVES when its time for Ellie to eat.

"I didn't do it."

She has discovered brooms, drawers, the dishwasher, shoes, toilet paper, the bathroom scale, the bathtub drain plug, the fancy balls that mommy keeps in a basket/tower thingy on the fireplace, daddy's computer keys, the vacuum cleaner cord, the drawer that sits just beneath the surface from which I am right now typing (has found change, stamps, earrings, flash drives, iPod ear buds...all kinds of neat things in there!). So her curiosity and propensity to explore means more than ever that I CANNOT TAKE MY EYES OFF OF HER. And I don't.

More work for me...less undivided time on Facebook...more time shucking my "to do list" to spend time sitting right with her and chasing her all over the house. I love it though. I love to see those wheels turning, the zest for more, more, more, as she takes in her little big world. UP TO 20th percentile in height and weight INTO 100 percent more than that!

We interrupt this marriage...

2010-09-04T20:59:00.001-05:00

It's here, folks! And just in time for kickoff, a cool breeze meanders in from my back porch and through the open french doors into our living room. Welcome, welcome Football & Fall.

I have one happy fella perched on the couch, tuckered out from today's noon-thirty game with a sunburn he wears as if it were a badge of honor.

We took Tate to the Raider Game last night and tailgated with a few friends. This was the first year since I've been up here that I didn't have a family member either on the field in uniform or shaking pom poms from the sidelines. Kind of sad to think that almost all of the cousins are grown.

I love how football brings everyone together; the young and the old, the Gator and the Dawg...the passion and frenzy that surrounds this season is exciting and special and treasured in our home.

2010 August

2010-08-15T21:07:00.001-05:00

Click here to view these pictures larger

And so it is

2010-08-14T14:24:00.000-05:00

I spent 30 years of my life believing that the New Year begins on the first day of January. As all parents of schoolagers know, that is not the case. The year begins anew for us every August when the first bell of the new school year sounds. Bittersweet goodbyes to a summer that we will remember fondly...

Mama was home with the boys and her new little girl. They collected bugs, planted a garden, watched fireworks, rode bicycles, ate Popsicles, spit watermelon seeds, dipped cucumbers in ranch dressing, ate tomato pie, swam in a lake, in a pool and in an ocean. Spent time with relatives, welcomed home some old college friends. Celebrated births, loved on friends. Built sandcastles and went fishing with dad. There were bee stings and skinned knees and a broken wrist. Big brother learned to ride his bike without training wheels AND how to swim without floaties. Mama and Daddy finally "got" the middle child- learned to appreciate that for him, life is light and fun. The baby learned to sit up and crawl and has fallen into the family rhythm of the rest.

The summer went quickly but was well documented with photos and entries into the journals that I keep for each child. Goodbye summer days with hours laid out before us with nothing to do but what we want. See you again next year.

2010-07-22T19:19:00.000-05:00

Six!

2010-06-09T12:09:00.000-05:00

How can my baby be six?

When I look at you, I can still feel my breath get taken away. I still marvel at your perfect face, your ten fingers and ten toes....the same ones we counted all those years ago. You make me smile with your humor and the way you can put everyone in a room in stitches. You live life loudly and fully with a heart bigger than the moon.

Bless your heart- you were my "starter baby". I've made a lifetime's worth of mistakes with you, yet you love me still. Giving birth to you was my first experience of what it feels like to have my heart beating out of my chest. I've kept you close to me, but lately have been learning to let you go...just a little. Let you be you and discover why God made you and what purpose you have here on earth. I hope we will be close forever and that you will always come to me, no matter what.

We both love music, love to dance, we're stubborn and dramatic, both have messy handwriting and we both like to laugh. But you are stronger than I. Funnier, more confident, more sensitive, more...well, just more. And I am thankful. I wouldn't change one thing about you son, you are an angel to me and every day I thank God that I get to be your mama.

2010-05-31T11:02:00.000-05:00

Movie Night MONDAY

2010-05-25T18:51:00.000-05:00

This is the last week of school for my Kindergartner, so we are celebrating each day. Monday was "MOVIE NIGHT Monday". I ordered The Princess and the Frog off of PPV and let the boys eat popcorn in my bed.

Today was "TASTY Tuesday" and I let the boys choose their treat of choice.

Tomorrow? "WATER Wednesday". The boys will be splashing in the baby pool and sliding on the slip-n-slide in the back yard. I CANNOT WAIT for school to get out!! Happy summer everyone!

How do you thank your mother?

2010-05-09T08:07:00.000-05:00

Is there anything that a child could ever do or say to thank their mother for the love, the care, the always "being there"? Only when I became a mother did I realize just how much a mother gives, does and loves. Today I want to thank my mother for one thing in particular: She took me to church.

Mom, I know it wasn't always (if ever) easy being a single mom. I know that there are things you would have done differently and I know there are probably times, if not years, you wish you could erase. But let me tell you today that because of you and your influence, I gave my heart to Jesus when I was 6 and have had a relationship with him ever since. You helped plant the spiritual seeds in me that will continue to grow in my heart and soul all the days of my life.

Thank you.

I love you.

Happy Mother's Day!

Cinco de Fun-O!

2010-05-07T07:27:00.000-05:00

My Gal

2010-05-03T08:05:00.001-05:00

This is Ellie's first bathing suit that she wore to Blythe & Bree's 4th birthday pool party. Did she swim? No! But I took advantage of the opportunity to let her sport her cute suit before she outgrows it. I LOVE dressing my girl. Derek is always making fun of me saying "She's like your little baby doll, isn't she?" Well...YES SHE IS!!

Shower the people you love with love...

2010-05-02T20:05:00.000-05:00

...and presents! This weekend I co-hosted a baby shower for my dear friend, Missy. She is expecting her 4th boy this summer and we wanted to share in her excitement and help her get ready for baby. Missy has quite a story, but it is hers to tell. I will just say that she is a very special and Godly person and I am blessed to call her a friend.

What's your passion?

2010-04-24T13:29:00.002-05:00

Almost 6 years ago the greatest dream for my life here on earth came true- I became a mother. Before my bundle of baby boy joy arrived, this was the life I envisioned:
Being that I felt that it was my calling in life to be a stay-at-home mom, surely God would equip me to be an expert: Me, a nice outfit and a bit of make-up greeting my husband every evening with a kiss and a cooing baby in my arms. "I'm so glad you're home", is what I'd say. Dinner, of course, would have already been lovingly prepared and it would be sitting on the candle-lit table as soft, relaxing music played in the background. Our home would be sparkling clean and clutter would be a thing of the past. After all, I was going to be home ALL day and the only thing I would have to do would be to take care of this 7 pound precious- I'd have all the time in the world to create the "perfect home".

Uh....yeah right! I have to admit that I was pretty devastated when the reality of a new baby combined with my general lack of "good housekeeping" skills collided into what was now my new reality. The truth? Sure, I greeted my husband every evening at the door...
...10 Nextel "direct connects" over the span of 5 minutes demanding "when will you be HOME???" later. When he did arrive, there I'd be- sleep deprived, un-showered with knots in my hair, spit up all over me thrusting the colicky baby into his arms almost yelling "Good, your home- now it's YOUR TURN!" As he looked at me bewildered, he'd take the baby and then navigate around all the baby "hunks of plastic junk" we'd managed to accumulate in a little under a month. Trying to find a spot on the couch amongst piles of unfolded laundry and Parenting books and magazines I'd dog-eared in a desperate attempt to figure out this thing called "mothering". And dinner? HAH! Isn't that what delivery is for?

I felt like a failure. How could it be that God had called me to be at home with my child, yet I was fairing so miserably? Alone in a new city without one person to go to for support, I spent months in despair. Then my mom suggested that I attend a MOPS meeting.

MOPS? What is that, I wondered? She explained that it was a group for mothers just like me who primarily stayed at home with their children. The group would probably be a source of support and friendship and a way for me to get connected with others in the community. The best part? It was a Christian group, so I knew that I would be among fellow believers.

So, I got on my computer, did a search on the Internet and contacted the Coordinator of the group that met closest to my house. When I finally went to my first meeting, I almost cried with relief as I sat among many women who were in situations just like mine. Some were seasoned mothers with brilliant advice and encouragement to give. Others were new moms. I remember one new mom in particular who was as scared as I was to drop her child off in MOPPETS. We'd both secretly sneak back to the nursery in between breakfast and Discussion Group time to check on our babies- who were doing just fine without us, I might add. It felt so good to know that other women were going through the same thing as I. For the first time since pledging Phi Mu 7 years prior, I felt "At Home" in this group of new friends.

Fast Forward one and a half years and another baby later, I found myself in a new town yet again. Without a MOPS group to attend, I formed a small playgroup with a few other moms from my church and community. We were fairly organized with a schedule and a rotation of hostesses, but I wanted something more for my fellow mommy-friends. I knew the friendship, encouragement and support that a MOPS group would offer and I wanted to share the MOPS experience with every "at home" mom I knew. I began praying about starting a MOPS group. Soon I would discover that when the Lord's will aligns with your heart's passion & desire...magic happens.

I set out to find "someone" who would start a MOPS group, praying the God would deliver the perfect leader. Someone with more biblical education than I; more connected in the community than I; someone braver & more confident than I. However, when I found this statement during my MOPS research, I knew I'd found the person that was to start the first MOPS group in Habersham County. "God does not call the equipped, he equips the called." That statement along with knowing "With God, all things are possible", gave me the confidence to take charge of this new group that I felt the Lord was leading me to begin.

It wasn't always easy and I had to "scrounge" up people to be on the very first Steering Team. ALL of whom I'd never met before, but found by word of mouth. I would go over to each potential Steering Team member's house and pour my heart and vision for MOPS out to them on our very first meeting. But the Lord moved mountains, gave us funding, found MOPS leaders and delivered us precious mothers to minister to.

Today, Habersham MOPS is 55 moms strong and growing and I could not be more thrilled to see the blessings that have been bestowed upon this group. One of the greatest pleasures that I have taken away from MOPS is to watch ordinary moms turn into extraordinary leaders- pushing the limits of their comfort zones and stepping up to God's calling. This year I will have the honor of assisting our newest MOPS Coordinator, Kimberly Chosewood. During our conversations about the future I had to reassure her time and time again that no, I am not "called" to be the Coordinator right now but feel it is my place to stand in the background and let her and the rest of the Steering Team shine. I cannot wait to watch Kimberly and the other Steering Team members grow closer to the Lord and become the Godly Leaders that He is equipping them to be.

Loving mothers is my passion and serving in this MOPS ministry is my reward. I urge you to find your passion, your calling in this life because I promise you, there is no greater feeling that knowing that you are serving His people in His will.

What's your passion? Share it with me in a comment attached to this post.

To find a MOPS group near you, visit: http:///www.mops.org

Even if I don't win...

2010-04-22T20:33:00.000-05:00

...I've still won.

My Friend and fellow blogger, Laura told me about an article in a recent edition of the Northeast Georgian titled "Grandmother of the Year nominations sought". So, being that I believe I have one of the most amazing grandmothers on the planet, I thought I'd nominate her. Below is the essay and thank you to Laura bringing this to me as well as editing my essay!

My Grandmother is the closest thing to “Jesus here on earth” that I have ever seen. She’s spent a lifetime serving and loving His people with her hands and her heart; thus leaving a Christ-centered legacy to her four children, nine grandchildren and three great-grandchildren. The name on her driver’s license reads Joyce Abernethy Allison, but those closest to her simply call her “Gram.”

She loves to tell the story of how she got the name “Gram”. Being the oldest grandchild, I had the unique opportunity to choose her “Grandma” name. One day in those early years I came and asked her “Grandmamma, can I call you Gram, like the Graham cracker?” She’s been Gram ever since.

Gram treats everyone like family and will feed anyone who walks through her door. Her macaroni and cheese and tomato pie leave you wanting to visit again real soon. She walks three miles a day, cheers for the Atlanta Braves and always puts God first. It’s hard to believe there will be 80 candles on her birthday cake this December- I am amazed by how she is still so actively giving to everyone around her.

The first Sunday of every month you’ll find Gram rocking a baby in the nursery at Bethlehem Baptist Church. Then on Monday, she’ll be delivering “Meals on Wheels.” Every Wednesday she’s preparing takeout meals for Bethlehem’s Family Fellowship Supper, and the fourth Monday of the month, she’s serving up food and love at the Clarkesville Soup Kitchen. So you see it’s not just her family that Gram pours her heart and service into, it’s her community too.

But it’s much more than selfless acts of service that make her such an incredible grandmother. She’s the one person that I can always count on when I’m in need- not only letting me live with her when my husband was deployed to Iraq, but again four years later with a husband and two sons in tow as we built our first house. It is her heart, her unconditional love for all people and the way she not only reads the Bible every day; she lives it. So when I recently gave birth to my first daughter, I found it only fitting to name her Ellison “Joyce.”

Spring Science

2010-04-20T11:55:00.001-05:00

We started two science experiments yesterday.
1: We caught a Caterpillar and we are hoping it will stay alive long enough to form a cocoon and turn into a butterfly. The caterpillar is fuzzy though, so it will probably end up being a moth. Brit named it "Shabby" and just had to draw a picture for him to look at while he is entrapped in our man made habitat.
2: Put a sweet potato in water. Wonder if it will grow roots???

Another mouth to feed...

2010-04-19T17:57:00.000-05:00

...is JUST what we need, right?

We finally added a four-legged friend to our family. Meet our German Short Hair Pointer, Rose:

From March & April 2010

Named by Tate, loved by us all...I think. I am not a "dog person" or any type of animal person for that matter, but I think it is important for children, especially little boys, to grow up with a dog to love and care for. She really is a sweet puppy and we've only had a few accidents in the house. She's definatley added a little more action around here, as if we didn't have enough already.

At laaaaast

2010-04-19T15:25:00.000-05:00

It's funny how life goes on whether you're blogging about it or not. I've taken a hiatus from contributing to the blogosphere, but I am back and more committed than ever to recording stories, thoughts and pictures of my everyday life. A lot has changed since my previous posts- numero uno being the fact that I have resigned from Initials, Inc. and am now a full-time stay at home mom. This may come as a shock, considering my post about truly having "it all", but it turns out "all" isn't always best- especially when the quality of it "all" lessens, the more things I have my hands into.

Truth: three children, a home, a husband, a LIFE and a JOB were too much for me to juggle. Now, I am back to where I need to be, concentrating on what matters most to me in the world- the living beings that reside within the 4 walls of my home.

Ahhhh....its good to be back!

I heart my birthday present

2010-03-08T22:06:00.000-05:00

My friends Abigail & Andrea gave me these vinyl letters for my birthday. I put them in my foyer and I LOVE THEM!!! Thanks, girls!

Our Saturdays these Days

2010-03-06T22:24:00.000-05:00

These days, we spend at least an hour at the ball park on Saturdays. Tate has been waiting to play ball for so long and now that he's finally old enough, he is loving every minute of it. And so are we. Derek is helping coach and my friend Joni and I are "dugout moms"...which means we will be helping the kids with the lineup- making sure they are ready and that they bat in order. Its a thrill a minute watching Tate have so much fun out there and watching Derek with all the kids.

Brit, Ellie and I stay behind the fence during practice...it has been hard on Brit though because he wants to be out there so bad. Derek makes sure that Brit has his own "practice" though. He will start soccer in the fall, we just felt like one kid, one sport, one season at a time was what will work best for us for now. Next year they can be on the same baseball team so that will work out great.

2010-03-02T20:00:00.000-05:00

When it's cold outside...

2010-03-02T16:24:00.000-05:00

mommy takes pictures inside

I've got EVERYTHING

2010-02-28T21:32:00.003-05:00

Sometimes I take for granted that my blog readers know what's going on in my life. I mean, if I post a few pics and get a few wall postings on Facebook and then just slam a picture of my daughter in a hospital room and call it "waiting for my ultrasound", one might think that I am the one waiting for the ultrasound or they may realize it is Ellie who is waiting but without an explanation...what will people think? So, my apologies for slapping a pic of my sweet girl. I'll give you the Cliff Notes version of the past week.

Derek had been out of town since Valentine's Day. He went to Boston for some corporate training and was due home on my birthday, Friday, February 26. I was careful not to blog or post about his absence just in case some serial stalker person were to read my blog or look at my Wall...just saying you can never be too careful.

Anyway, I'd like to say that we were managing pretty well while he was gone. Thanks to a few helpful friends and family to help me get kids from here to there, we were doing pretty good on our own. A week into my stint as a single mom (this past Monday) Ellie began running a fever. It was 100.7 then Tylenol took it down to the 98's when I put her to bed. I heard her fussing in her bassinet which is still in my room around 1 AM. I reached for her in her crib and she was blazing hot. Her cry was more like a whimper. I ran to her nursery and took her temp. When the thermometer reached 104 I began to freak...at 104.8 I thought I might pass out.

I dropped the thermometer and ran to get a dose of Tylenol. Then I reached for the phonebook to call the hospital but the listed number was WRONG. Dialed 411 and my mouth was so dry and I was so paralyzed by fear that it took me FOREVER to get the words "Habersham County Medical Center" out of my mouth. All I kept telling myself was that I was all that my little girl had right then and I had to do what I had to do to get her to the hospital. When I finally got in touch with a nurse at the hospital, she said to come right away.

I called my aunt and uncle and told them to meet me in the ER then I put Ellie in her carrier without even putting her diaper back on and then ran and literally dragged the boys out of bed. I kept telling them to run to the car because Ellie was very very sick. Looking back on that moment, I could cry. I was so scared, my three month old is blazing hot and whimpering a cry that I've never heard, and my little boys are being so brave after getting abruptly woken in the middle of the night. I did the only thing I could do- I prayed. I begged God for her life, then thanked him for the three months I had with her and acknowledged that she isn't really mine at all, but His. If he chose to take her now, then there was nothing I could do about it. I know that sounds so melodramatic, but I really thought she might not make it.

Once we were all in the car, we began what felt like one of the longest rides of my life. I kept telling the boys to talk to Ellie to make sure she was awake. How horrible for them to have to see their mother so gripped by fear.

We arrived at the ER and I ran in with Ellie, hoping the boys were following me. When I got to the waiting room, there was NO ONE THERE!!! Then a nurse came through the double doors pushing a patient in a wheel chair, not caring that I had a very sick infant in my arms. Finally, when Ellie started to make vomiting/choking sounds, I busted through the double doors yelling that my baby was choking and the nurse grabbed Ellie from me. I know. I know. I know that I looked like a freaky, insane and unstable mother, but I was SCARED TO DEATH.

Once the nurses started looking at her I remembered that the boys were in the waiting room. Another nurse went to get them for me and then it wasn't until I heard her say "get her some booties" did I realize not only was I not wearing any shoes, I didn't have socks on either! I didn't care.

When the boys and I were in the room, looking at Ellie, I looked over at Tate and he has these huge alligator tears running down his cheeks and says "she is the sickest baby ever". That's when I was glad they hadn't seen the freak out behind the double doors. I knew that I had to stay calm for my boys and reassure them that Ellie was going to be OK even though I really wasn't sure if she was.

Well, thank the Lord that our good friend Josh was the Dr. on call that night. He handled everything (and me) beautifully. They got the fever to go down, and after several tests including a cathatarization, they determined that she had a UTI. She was given a dose of rocepherin and a prescription for antibiotics. Ellie and I finally headed home around 4:30. (My aunt and Uncle had taken the boys home as soon as I was sure that Ellie was going to be OK)

What followed was around the clock Tylenol doses trying to bring down a 103 fever and finally an appointment with her pediatrician Wednesday. Because her fever had still not subsided, her pediatrician told me she needed to admit her. I had been anticipating this after speaking with one of my friends who had been through a similar experience with her daughter that involved a UTI. Our suspicion was Kidney reflux.

So I called Derek and told him to get a flight home and then I called my mom and asked her to meet me at Scottish Rite. After three days, IV antibiotics and several tests, Ellie is just fine. No Kidney reflux, no mysterious disease. It looks like an infection that just got out of hand.

SO many people prayed us through this one and I will be forever grateful. If you have a healthy child...you have EVERYTHING. Even in the scariest moments, I knew that God was in control and that He is my Creator and the Author of the story that is my life. He has a purpose for everything He sends our way.

Here are a few photos from our brief hospital stay...my brave little girl who never cried until the IV tape was taken off.

From 2010-02-25

From 2010_02_25

Waiting for my ultrasound

2010-02-25T14:22:00.000-05:00

Soul-stirring

2010-02-18T09:43:00.002-05:00

Do you ever get the feeling that there is something stirring in your soul? Like God is trying to tell you to make a change or do something, but you have no idea what it is? I have that feeling and I can't shake it. Praying for clarity and to be open to His will in all that I do....

Workin' Woman

2010-02-11T08:58:00.003-05:00

So I am in my 4th week of being officially "back to work". What does that look like for me? Well, to be honest it is THE MOST ideal situation, working for THE MOST incredible COMPANY!

My schedule:
In the office on Mondays & Tuesdays from 8:30-2:30 while one of my very best friends comes to my house wand watches Ellie and Britton. All of my other work is done from home.

Warning- Girlfriend talk ahead!
I am adamant about breastfeeding and keeping my milk supply up, so being away from Ellie for such a short period of time, I only have to pump once while I am away. I hook my little "milk machine" (as the boys call it) up to an outlet in the back seat of my van and 5 minutes later I am walking back into the office with 6 ounces of "mother's finest". Something about hooking up to the car makes the pump go crazy...instead of the wooo.......wooooo.....woooo it does at home, it is more like woowoowoowoowoo.

Anyhoo...
On "office days" when Derek is not here, I leave the house at 7:45, drop Tate off at school and then work until 2:30. When I get off, I go pick up Tate and am home by 3:00.

On "work from home days", Tate is in school of course and Britton attends The Little School from 8am - 12 pm. So Ellie and I pick Brit up at noon and then head back out again later in the afternoon to get Tate. As much as I hate getting Ellie out in the cold...she is with me all day Wed-Sun and I wouldn't trade it for the world.

The first few weeks were a bit rough. It is difficult to balance work/family/housekeeping duties, etc. but we are finally hitting a stride and settling into our new routine. I absolutely LOVE the work I am doing and need it as my creative outlet. I work for the most phenomenal women- Christians, and just plain old good-hearted friends. I am so very thankful to GOD for this opportunity to get out of the house, contribute to my family financially and to truly have a sense of "having it all". Never in a million years would I have guessed that I would have such an opportunity in a little ol' mountain town.

January 2010

2010-02-05T17:56:00.000-05:00

Check out my new blog header!

2010-02-04T22:37:00.002-05:00

I finally figured it out!!

Ellie at two months

2010-01-25T16:14:00.000-05:00

New Addition

2010-01-02T20:36:00.003-05:00

OK, so a bonus room being finished is not technically a new addition, but it will feel like it once it is finished. Derek and I have spent the majority of 2010 working on the house. I have been cleaning, throwing out toys and trying to organize the papers of our life. Derek has been working vigilantly on finishing the bonus room. We intend to make it into a playroom for the kids which will hopefully mean keeping the "hunks of plastic junk" confined to one room in the house. I am blown away by how much he has been able to accomplish...and all on his own! So far he has done the wiring, insulation and sheet rock. Can't wait to see how this will turn out!

Just what I wanted!

2009-12-26T12:36:00.005-05:00

Merry Christmas, yes it was.

All I want for Christmas is for nothing to change...

2009-12-02T12:23:00.004-05:00

So I think my heart may explode into a million pieces at any moment. This little girl...this little family of five...this safe, warm house...this over abundance of blessings...my heart is filled to the brim with joy, love, peace and humility. Thank you, Jesus.

The newest member of our family was born on November 21 at 1:06 pm after seven minutes of pushing...will she always be this easy? My heart grew 10 times its size the day Ellison Joyce was born. Is it my age that makes me appreciate every little hair on her body, her tiny toes and her sweet grunting? Is it that she is a girl...born to be protected by her daddy and I? Is it that our family has a sense of completeness with this new bundle of joy? Whatever it is, I'll take it and I will treasure these moments of bliss forever.

6 lbs, 13 oz, 19 inches long and the sweetest little girl angel I've ever met...I wish that time could be frozen and that she wouldn't get a minute bigger. That her my finger would fit in the palm of her hand as she nurses, that her coos and grunts would be the soundtrack of my life. That her small eyes and tiny mouth would greet me every morning from here on after.

Oh, but they grow. And she is is the daughter of our Lord, lent to me for what will seem like a flash of time. I will be forever grateful to be the mother of a little girl and two precious boys. Not sure if Ellie will be the last, but I will treat each moment as if she is...treasuring, capturing and holding them close to my heart.

All four of us are head over heels in love with this little girl....

Bedrest- Day 1

2009-10-23T08:37:00.003-05:00

I guess today will be considered my first full day of bedrest since the days before have been filled with Dr.'s appointments (yesterday we spent 6 hours at the hospital). I am now on Brethine every 4 hours instead of every six and can get out of the bed for 10 minutes of every hour. The Brethine makes me very shaky, HOT and thirsty- I guess it could be worse though.

My family is totally bailing me out with the kids, meals...everything and I am so very grateful. I've gotten all my bills paid today and was able to watch Good Morning America. Not sure what the rest of the day will hold, hopefully some visits from friends!

Thanks for all of the prayers and well wishes, I really appreciate everything. We are hoping to make it two more weeks before this little girl arrives.

Love to all of you!

Merideth

Hang in there, baby girl.

2009-10-21T17:33:00.002-05:00

There's no better time to blog than when you are on bed rest, am I right?

So, maybe I overdid it yesterday at the photo shoot, or maybe this little girl would have tried to make her way into the world today, regardless- I just don't know.

I am 34 1/2 weeks along and I started having very painful contractions (like the ones you can barely breathe through) today and then they were followed by some mild ones...about 8 minutes apart. I kept calling them cramps at first because for this body, preterm contractions just don't happen unless they are Braxton Hicks.

Anyway, Derek drove me to the doctor around 1:30 and I got hooked up to the monitor. After three contractions they checked me and I was 70% effaced and 2 cm dilated- the Dr. could feel her head. So, they gave me a prednisone shot to help strengthen her lungs and prescribed a medication meant to stop contractions and also put me on bed rest for the next two weeks. Not an ideal situation considering we still haven't moved into our house and I have not a stitch of little girl newborn clothing since my shower is not until this Saturday. However, things could be much, much worse- I have friends who are or have been on bed rest for MONTHS and who have delivered babies months early. All that matters is that the baby seems to be doing well- we just want her to cook a little longer.

I go into tomorrow at 8:30 am for another shot and then back to the Dr. on Friday for a check. The good news is that the contractions are more like 30 minutes apart instead of eight, so maybe the meds are working. If they don't stop though and get closer together than the Dr. told us to go to the hospital. Keeping a positive outlook though that we won't be making any trips to Gainesville any time soon.

Please pray for Derek as he works, handles the boys and manages the completion & closing of our house. He says he is "game" for it all, but I know these next few weeks will be tough on him.

I'll keep everyone posted and if anyone is in the HAB and wants to pay me a visit- come on by!!

Derek & Tate's Karaoke Debut

2009-10-14T22:06:00.002-05:00

Every night we take probably a little more time than we should putting our boys to bed. I have a special song that I sing to them and Derek has one too. This is "Daddy's" song, as sung by Derek & Tate at Harry A's in St. George, October 2009. Also happens to be the Karaoke debut of Derek and Tate.

28 Weeks and counting

2009-09-10T19:29:00.002-05:00

I am 28 weeks along as of Monday. I am already feeling her float up to my ribs where she likes to hang out all day long. Everything looks good- she is growing just as she should.

I've been a bit stressed latley, especially after learning that our house probably will not be done until mid to late October. I was hoping to be all settled in by now so we could have time to enjoy our new surroundings and concentrate on the boys. Truthfully, when this whole house journey began, I thought we'd be moving in by June...guess not.

The cabinets go in on Monday & Tuesday; granite and floors to follow. I know we don't have much longer, but the last few weeks seem like the longest.

The boys have been restless latley- most afternoons have been spent at various building materials places- flooring store, granite place, appliance store, cabinet makers, etc. I feel bad about dragginf them all around town, but I really do not have a choice.

We found out that Derek may have some sort of genetic disorder that has caused the sickness he has had over the past two years. Waiting to hear back from the insurance company as to whether or not they will cover the geneitc testing. We will do it either way though- we are willing to do whatever is necessary to get some answers. The good news is that it doesn't look like it is anything earth-shattering; just something that he will have to learn to live with, as he has pretty much done already.

Work has been so very busy. Struggling to keep the the "part time" in my job description. I have my dream job though and work for wonderful people- am thankful, so thankful that I have the option and chance to be employed right now.

I haven't been very dilligent about blogging latley- I feel guilty posting anything unless I have pictures, but half the time I cannot find the cord that attaches to my camera, so I just don't bother blogging.

Love reading up on my blogging friends- I am enjoying all the happiness that pours onto my computer screen and all the smiling faces of your beautiful children.

Blessings to all...hope to post a picture of the house (painted) soon!!

Link to New House Photos

2009-08-29T14:07:00.001-05:00

New photos of the house posted to FB:
http://www.facebook.com/home.php#/album.php?aid=119205&id=736045128&ref=mf

...I hope this works.

First Day of School

2009-08-15T15:37:00.010-05:00

Tate started "Big School" at Clarkesville Elementary on Friday, August 7th. We had open house the day before where we saw his classroom and met his teachers. Tate was excited about it until we walked into the classroom. He clammed up and had the worst grimace on his face. I wasn't prepared for that because he had been talking all summer about being so excited about starting Kindergarten. We took the tour, met his sweet teacher, Mrs. Herrin and her Para Pro. Towards the end of the visit (after a dose of sugar cookies and lemonade from the cafeteria) he began to loosen up and I believe, actually enjoyed himself.

I, on the other hand, cried when we pulled into the driveway of the school, choked back tears during open house and cried...well, more like sobbed all the way home. I kept saying to Derek "I just keep thinking about the day we brought him home from the hospital!"

To be honest, I shocked myself with my reaction to Tate starting school. So many of my other Kindergarten mama friends have been dreading this day for a long time, but I felt mostly happy about it because I knew that Tate was ready and that he would do great. The flood of emotions surrounding this day and this past week have truly caught me off guard.

The morning of the first day, we wanted to make it really special, so Derek got up extra early and made pancakes with whipped cream and cherries on top. The pancakes were a hit and we truly had an enchanted morning without fuss that I will remember for a very long time.

When we got to school, Derek, Britton and I walked Tate in. Before we got to the door Tate said "Let's go ahead and hug now" (before we got too close to the door) and he also decided that he did not want to hold our hands anymore. We were shocked that this little 5 year old who we still sing to sleep at night was trying to be so big...and was acting like he didn't need us anymore! Needless to say, we obliged and let him lead the way to his First Day.

He was a lot happier than the day before when we got to his classroom. He saw a few of his friends and after putting away his backpack and snack, went right to his name on the carpet to take a seat. No tears, seemingly no anxiety- he was where he needed to be and quite comfortable with it.

We left the school with a little less tears than the day before- but still a nagging in our hearts. My sweet friends Nancy & Sarah threw a brunch for all of our Kindergarten-mommy-friends. Looking forward to this brunch is partly what got me through the morning- knowing that I would soon be among women that knew exactly what I was going through- even without saying a word. This brunch was a Godsend, girls.

So, here we are 6 days of Kindergarten later and I am pretty sure that I am over the mourning period. Isn't that what we all want? For our kids to be strong and healthy and emotionally stable enough to be secure and happy when they are away from us? Letting go hurts, but the way it happened this past week...I wouldn't have it any other way.

Then there is little Britton. He started a brand new preschool this week- The Little School. He is there 8-2 on the 4 days of the week that I work. His teacher, Mrs. Desi is precious and I know he is loved and cared for during the day. His first day went great when I dropped him off. Mrs. Desi said that he was quiet during lunch so she asked him what was wrong and he said "I just need someone to hold me."!! Can you believe that? When she told me, I almost lost it...my baby...still needing someone to hold him, and that someone wasn't me...yes, I was flooded with guilt.

The next day he clung to me for about 15 minutes before I could get out of the door. Each day after that has gotten better and better and Mrs. Desi says he is coming out of his shell and making friends. I am so glad. It is Britton that I worry the most about- he is reserved and sometimes it is hard to tell what he is thinking. He is a teacher's dream though and seems to reserve his worst behavior just for me.

Being so close to moving into our house...our situation with the hours I put in at work is temporary I hope. I pray for a solution after the baby is born that works for my family and works for Initials, Inc. I am in prayer that it will all work out.

Gosh, I love my boys. All three of them...Derek has been recovering from surgery that he had Wednesday and is not doing as well as I had hoped. We've had a very emotional past three weeks- 2 surgeries, babies starting school, many, many decisions made about the house, sleepless nights, etc. I hope the rest of August isn't so emotionally exhausting.

All is well

2009-07-28T19:36:00.002-05:00

Just wanted to thank everyone for all the prayers & well wishes for Tate's surgery. Everything went well- we are just worn out from what turned out to be an entire day at the hospital. He is on pain meds and bandaged up, but already playing with Britton. Glad it is over- it is not fun to watch your child go through something like this, especially when it involves pain!

Thanks again for every one's sweet comments.

Tomorrow- please pray for Tate

2009-07-27T18:52:00.002-05:00

I'll skip posting this on Facebook, but I will ask my blog reading friends to pray for Tate tomorrow. He is having a circumcision "re-do". The doctor did not take off enough skin when he was born, so before it becomes an issue, we are having it taken care of. We have to be at the hospital at 8AM and supposedly he will not go in until 11. We've explained everything to him and he is OK with it. Derek did an amazing job being open and honest about the procedure and eliminating any fear or anxiety Tate may have. Just pray that the surgeon does a good job and that there are no adverse effects from the anesthesia.

Thanks,
A mama on her knees

It's a GIRL!

2009-07-20T18:39:00.004-05:00

It's been a week since found out that baby Shaw # 3 is a girl. I think I am still a little in shock but I am getting used to the idea of lots of pink. I cried like a baby during the sonogram as soon as the technician "proved" that the baby was a girl. This really is a dream come true for me.

When I got back to the office after my Doctor's visit- this was hanging in the doorway when I came in:
Then I got to my desk an a present was sitting in my chair from Andrea. My first little girl outfit! The day kept getting better and better and opening up this gift made everything seem more real to me.Then my friends arranged an impromptu PINK party that night- this is what was served:

What an amazing day! The clothes, the bucket, the PINK party...I felt like I was living someone else's life.

Saturday, I wanted to buy a few girl things and found this at Gymboree...just begging to be embriodered with a monogram!

And how sweet will this be for the newborn little sister?

Everyone is so happy for us, which makes this time all the more blissful! Just praying for a healthy remainder of the pregnancy and an easy birth!!

New Pics of the House

2009-06-17T11:07:00.001-05:00

Here is where we were two weeks ago. Finally have shingles on the roof (1st & 2nd pics). The heating and air guys are almost finished and sheetrock supposedly begins on the 29th. Our builder is saying we will move in late August...I am betting September, but we'll see.

Its definatley getting exciting, thinking we will have a place of our own soon. I am most excited about the yard...so much room for the boys to play around in.

I go to the doctor Friday...I will be almost 17 weeks- I keep putting my appointment off for various reasons, so I am a little off schedule...maybe they will let me do an ultrasound that day??? I don't know if I can wait 4 more weeks!

House Update

2009-05-01T07:29:00.005-05:00

March and April have clearly been busy months at the construction site. We've been picking out cabinets, appliances, hardware, doors, windows, etc. I cannot say enough good things about our builder (my great-uncle Mack) who has thus far provided a completley stress-free building experience. Sorry its been so long since a post- hoping to be better in the future.

The real reason for the new mini van

2009-04-29T17:54:00.003-05:00

OK, folks. By now most of Habersham County knows so I'll announce to the blogosphere that baby Shaw #3 is on the way! 9 weeks 2 days today and enjoying bouts of morning, afternoon and evening sickness!! Like Heather said the other day..."So THAT'S why you bought a mini van"!

I've been reluctant to post this becuase I had a misscarriage in February. I did not know how much that scared me until I was pregnant again and even after 3 positive tests was not completely convinced there was a baby in my belly until I saw the ultrasound last week. He/She is in there, allright, healthy and thriving. We are thrilled about expanding our family and are even closer to our end goal (God willing) of 4 children.

My due date is November 3oth so hopefully by then we will be all settled in our new house with a freshly painted room in pale pink or calming blue.

It's hard for me to be "over the moon" about this baby- trying not to get too attached but also thanking God for the blessing, no matter what the outcome. Prayers from friends and family are appreciated.

A great day to D.E.A.R.

2009-03-06T13:51:00.002-05:00

This morning was my first Friday off with my new part time schedule. I thought I'd be a "fun mom" and not make Tate go to school, after all- its only Pre-K. We got up at 7AM and by 8:30 I remembered the final straw that helped me convince myself to go back to work- the incessant FIGHTING between my sons! By 9AM someone had gotten scratched, gotten a Hot Wheel thrown at them, stolen someones race track and broke someones Power Ranger. I was determined not to let my good intentions get completely obliterated, so I instituted our very first D.E.A.R. (Drop Everything And Read).

I told each of them to pick out a book , take it to their bed and to quietly read. This command was met with sounds of agony and whining but eventually they both found a book and got in bed. I was prepared for 5 minutes of peace, but it turned into almost 30! I know that doesn't sounds like a lot of time, but it was 30 minutes of heaven- enough for me to hear myself think as I got everything ready for us to leave for all of our errands.

My boys will be experiencing many, many more DEAR moments in their lifetime!!

It's official...

2009-03-03T19:10:00.003-05:00

I'm a soccer mom- mini van and all. Today was Tate's first ever sports practice- soccer. Derek is the coach and I am his assistant (read- schedule keeper, drink bringer, parent communicator). The joke is that neither one of us knows much about soccer, but the kids needed a coach so we volunteered.

We went to Dick's on Saturday to buy all of the gear- of course Brit wanted everything that Tate was getting and I didn't have the heart to tell him no. Finally, Derek came up with a brilliant idea- buy Brit a three dollar whistle and call him the assistant coach. Brit went for it, so we were able to put all of his unnecessary equipment back on the shelf. Next year, buddy.

Before practice, Tate was so proud when he put on his shin guards and cleats- he was convinced that the cleats will make him run faster than ever. He had a ball "dribbling" and learning how to "stop". Even though it was freezing outside, I think practice went well and the kids had fun.

Looking forward to a great season.

On another note, they poured our basement walls yesterday and took the casings off today. Now we need to figure out where we want the bathroom studded in the basement and where we want the load bearing wall to be. New pics to come soon.

The Mommy Wars

2009-03-02T20:54:00.003-05:00

Oh, how I dislike that phrase. It is a phenomenon that does not necessarily find one mother pitted against another, but one mother pitted against herself. Mothers fall into basically 3 categories: SAHM, WAHM, WOTHM- no matter which mother you chose to be, I'd bet you have your fair share of guilt. As my boss always says- "When the baby comes out, the guilt comes in." I've definitely had that war within myself and after 7 months of actively trying to figure it out, I think I've finally found a place in life that I can minimize the guilt and make the most of my life as I raise my babies.
*******************************************
My first 4 years as a mother were spent at home. I felt blessed to have the option to stay at home with my children- the days were filled with art projects, naps, home made lunches, lazy days on the couch, play dates, lunch with friends, play groups, forts in the living room, story time at the library, afternoons in the park...I could go on and on. I thought I was never going to work full time or even part time again. But, I must admit that even though my cup runneth over, I still felt like something was missing...like there must be something more.

I didn't face the fact that I wasn't 100% happy as a Stay At Home Mom until the possibility of a job came to my attention last July. It was basically my dream job- designing bags, coordinating photo shoots, creating marketing material and being a part of a Christian company that I believe is changing the world one woman at a time. But who would I be if I wasn't the typical SAHM, MOPS Coordinator and Preschool Teacher? Taking a leap of faith, I interviewed for the job, got hired and threw myself into my new status as a WOTHM.

The first weeks were exciting, refreshing and full of self re-discovery. My heart tugged at the thought of being away from my children all day, but my time with them was more precious than ever and more treasured. I went through an amazing experience that allowed me to remember who Merideth is- the person- not just the mother. The weeks turned to months and I found myself with an exciting career and happier than I've been in years.

In November our childcare situation changed and suddenly I found myself literally getting sick to my stomach on Sunday nights- the night before the work week would begin on Monday. I prayed and prayed that God would either confirm my decision to work or derail my plans and make it so that I had no choice but to leave my job. November and December passed with no resolve. The childcare situation wasn't getting any better, so finally in January I made the decision to approach my boss about going part time.

I honestly did not think that part time would be an option, but I knew that above all else I am a mother and wife first, and all the other titles fall well below. I went to my boss and laid my hear out on the table and told her what kind of situation would be the best for me and my family- part time work, M-TH 8:30-2:00, no Fridays. And against all odds in my book- she agreed to let me go part time!!

Today was my first day as a part time WOTHM and I have found myself literally holding my breath because I feel like all of this is too good to be true. I get to go to a fabulous job in the morning and them am there to pick up my kids as soon as school is over. I am so very thankful for this opportunity and I thank God every minute of the day that He has allowed this ideal situation to happen for me and my family.

As for the Mommy Wars- I believe that we, as mothers, do everything we can to make the best decision for our families. Motherhood is a sisterhood of women trying to figure it all out one day at a time- all the while trying to love our precious babies and provide them with the richest childhood imaginable. No matter what your acronym is- I bet that you are an amazing mother who is your own worst critic and I can almost promise you that your child or children think you're perfect!

31derful

2009-03-01T07:53:00.003-05:00

OK, I know this is a bit late, but I just have to say that my 31st birthday was one of, if not the best birthday I've ever had.

It began the night before, I came home to a living space that has been cleaned from top to bottom (laundry included) by my grandmother and aunt! I could not believe it- that was the best birthday present I've ever gotten.

The morning of my birthday Derek asked me to get on his computer and look at some spreadsheets he had created of our finances. I thought that was a little weird since I handle all of our finances and I've never known him to create a spreadsheet just for the fun of it. So, I opened up his laptop and found my own blog page starting back at me. As you know, he broke into my account and posted some really sweet things about me.

When the kids got up, they were excited to wish me happy birthday and gave me lots of kisses and hugs.

When I arrived at work I was greeted by lots of "Happy Birthdays" and a beautiful gift from my boss.

Two of my very best friends took me to our favorite Mexican restaurant for lunch and we got to wear those funny Mexican hats.

After work, we had BUNCO and then after that, the group of 5 friends that I feel like are my sisters gave me a party with cake, balloons, china and presents. We hung out for a little while and watched the Tivo version of American Idol.

I feel blessed to have been able to experience such a special day, almost every minute of it spent with people I love dearly.

OH, and then I got home to a zillion birthday greetings on Facebook. I know that sounds silly, but it just feels great to have that many people recognize you on your special day- I love technology.

Thanks to everyone that made February 26, 2009 so wonderful!!!

My Sweet Wife....Happy Birthday

2009-02-26T00:24:00.002-05:00

Merideth

You are turning another year older today and it seems like yesterday that were both in our early 20's and in love. Standing in the front of a church excited, scared, and happier than we had ever been. All we had were each other and that was more than enough.

Now we are in our early 30's, four strong, you have different titles like...mom..but all I see when I look at you is that pretty young girl that I fell in love with and made me laugh like no one I had ever known. Only now you are stronger, wiser, and still just as beautiful. You are also a strong Christian woman and trust him with you life.

I get to see you with our kids and how you love them, take care of them, are patient with them. I also get to see when they make your facial expressions. Learn new things with you and laugh with you.

You are so much of what I am not...and I think that is what makes us a good fit. God knew that I needed someone that would take the Old man out of me and push me to try new things and not be so conservative. You are so gifted in ways that I will never be.

I guess what I am trying to say is that YOU ARE SPECIAL. Everyday I thank God for you being in my life. You are more than I could have ever hoped for in a wife. I love you very much and I look forward to growing old with you.

Have a wonderful birthday.

Love Derek

Band Aid Moment

2009-02-25T15:10:00.003-05:00

This morning was anything but sunny in the Shaw house. I got up extra early and made the boys eggs and toast. I set the table, poured the juice and put the hot food on the table. I lovingly woke the boys to tell them that their breakfast was ready with the hopes that they would gobble up their food, put on their clothes and be ready to let my grandmother help them put on their clothes by 7:30 so we could be out the door by 7:35.

I'll spare you all the details of what happened next.
Bottom line- our morning was anything but sunny.

So, in order to keep my heart from continuing to break all day, I surprised Tate at school and had lunch with him. When he saw me walk in, his smile took up his whole face and he sat up in his chair so high, that I thought hey might float to the ceiling like a bright red balloon! Oh, I'll never forget that sweet look of surprise and sheer joy on his face.

So, we ate taco meat, macaroni and cheese, corn, salad and water. I held his hand and kissed him and reminded him that no matter what, I'll always love him. It was a Band Aid moment for my heart and his- it was the best lunch I've had in years.

Tuesday 2/24 Day 6

2009-02-24T21:13:00.002-05:00

Looks like the gravel was brought in today and the stakes were laid for the pouring of the walls. Rain is in the forecast for the end of this week...

I see dirt- Under Construction Week 1

2009-02-23T20:51:00.007-05:00

Yep, the day that we have been waiting 6 months for finally arrived on Tuesday, February 17! I must admit I was overwhelemed by emotion as I realized that our dream of a home in the middle one of the most peaceful places I've ever been is finally on its way to becoming a reality. So, what does the construction of a home look like to someone who thinks "silt fence" is actually called "silk fence"?

Tuesday 2/17 Day 1

3 months of land hunting, 1 home sale, 6 months of houseplans; 1 construction loan processing; 5 building permits and 1 month of EPA persuasion later, they finally break (a little) ground and put the double silt fence up by the pond to prevent construction erosion from getting into the water.

Wednesday 2/18 Day 2
It Rained

Thursday 2/19 Day 3

13 trees are lost; grading begins

Friday 2/20 Day 4 & Monday 2/23 Day 5

Grading is halted by irate Home Owner's Association President. Wires had been crossed and the approval of our plans is up in the air. An hour later Derek and I present plans (again) and talk the HOA President off the ledge. He apologizes profusely and grading resumes. The culvert under is installed and the driveway is graded.

Side view of the house and The driveway

The front of the house and Front of the house, different angle

Derek and I went out this evening and measured the stakes. We took a pretend tour of the house, visualizing which room would be where and laughing that its hard to imagine an entire house based on a rectangle in the dirt. We are so excited we can barely stand it! The plan is to complete the grading tomorrow, pour the footings on Wednesday/Thursday and pour the walls on Friday/Saturday...weather permitting.

The 3-Day Birthday Bonanza

2009-02-05T20:08:00.004-05:00

I've been a bad mama for the past 2 years, never giving a Britton much more of a gathering of family to celebrate his birthday. This year we were determined to do anything we could to make him feel special- thus the three-day Birthday Bash:

Day 1:

Jan 30th- his reald birthday. Gram made him a cake and he got to open presents!

Day 2:

Build-a-Bear and ChuckECheese

Day 3:

A birthday party with our closest friends

Dear Britton,

2009-01-29T21:56:00.004-05:00

Today is the last day you'll be two. I remember the day you were born and the instant I first held you. I've never been filled with so much joy in my life. With Tate, the joy was trumped by the fear of him not breathing, but with you and your loud cries- it was the purest moment of joy I've ever experienced. I remember that for the first two weeks you would only sleep if you were in someone's arms. I remember how you had the hardest time staying awake while I nursed you. I remember, as you got bigger, how you would lay down in your crib and push your booty up in the air to fall asleep. I remember you always with those big blue eyes and sweet smile. You're a terror at times now, probably becuase I've let you have your way so much. I cannot believe three years have passed since your birth. I am so glad that God blessed us with you- I love being your mother. You never ate baby food- you just went straight to the real stuff. WHy you don't eat anything now, I don't know.

I remember how happy you were with yourself this day. You have ALWAYS loved pens. You're the kid that draws on everything- walls, couches, carpet, people- you don't discriminate

You've always wanted to do everything Tate does. You've been exposed to more choking hazards than DFCS would approve of.

Your favorite type of cheese is still sharp shredded.

Notice the crayons, once again thrilled to have a writing instrument in hand. How many times have I picked up your crayons, pens, markers and pencils?

You're my messer, my snuggle bug, my bitsy bells, my shmiddia, my belles, my sistsy, my bitzy, my sweet Britton. I love you.

Photos From the Grove Park Inn

2009-01-25T18:17:00.003-05:00

Happy Anniversary to Us

2009-01-19T19:46:00.002-05:00

Each year on the day my calendar tells me its January 18th, I know that Derek and I have closed another chapter on the book that is our marriage.

Chapter One: Who knew it would begin like this? When Derek proposed in December of 2002, visions of a crisp fall wedding with chocolate colored bridesmaids dresses and rich reds and oranges danced in my head. Oh...and the honeymoon- I'd never been to a tropical island before...I couldn't wait for the life I'd always dreamed of to unfold. Little did we know that less than a month later we would be married. 2 weeks after that he would be sent to Fort Stewart and 2 months after that he would be on a plane to Iraq. So much for a honeymoon.

People that know me usually know that part of the story. What they don't know is how two people fell apart in a Holiday Inn hours before deployment. How there couldn't have been enough tissues or toilet paper to dry the tears or wipe the noses that belonged to two broken hearts. I thought that I would crumble under the weight of the grief. The thought of never seeing this man again was almost more than I could bare...but bare it I did.

The truth is, that my journey as a "war bride" was the one that lead me straight to a deeper, more meaningful relationship with my heavenly Father. Friends and family kept me busy during that year, but my true strength came from the Lord.

Years later I know that Derek got deployed so that my soul could be saved. I was baptised at the age of 6 and always knew there was a God. I had prayed, and sinned, and prayed, and sinned...and so on. I spent my college years chasing self worth from what others thought of me- awards and recognition never could do the trick.

It wasn't until I felt that I had nothing, that I gained it all. While Derek was overseas I threw myself into studying God's word. As He revealed Himself to me, I went through a phase of self-discovery and finally realized that I am a daughter of The King, I was sent here for a purpose and that the only way to true joy and happiness is through Jesus Christ.

The night before Derek was deployed, I got on my knees and begged God not to take him. I begged and I cried out- why now, Lord? Now all I can do is fall on my knees before Him and thank Him. THANK YOU, LORD! You took away my husband so that I would find You.

When my grandfather died in my presence that year, it wasn't my husband's shoulder I cried on. Instead I cried out- THANK YOU, Lord. Thank you for allowing me to be here for my grandmother and to have had the experience of getting to know my grandfather and be with him in the final hours of life. It wouldn't have been that way if Derek were here.

When I found out I was expecting a baby there were no long, giddy talks about the future with my husband's hand on my belly. I couldn't surprise him by wrapping up a pair of booties and offering an impromptu gift. Instead there were heartfelt prayers and long conversations with God about being a good and godly mother.

When I woke up one morning and I thought I was having a miscarriage, my husband wasn't there to hold me or to drive me to the hospital. I had no choice but to give my child to the Lord that day and to trust His plans for my baby.

Year 1 of my marriage will always be special to me. Not because I had the fall wedding of my dreams or honeymooned in an exotic land or made burned dinners and yelled about the toilet seat being up. Chapter 1 of my life with Derek would, in the end, be the one that told the story of a young woman finding the meaning of life- a life intended and given by none other than Jesus Christ.

So, each year, when the calendar tells me its January 18, not only do I recall the day I said "I do" in a snow covered church in Clarkesville, I am reminded and humbled of the year God took my husband away so that I could find true happiness in Christ and love Him forever.

I am asking you to BELIEVE. God commands it.

2009-01-06T21:07:00.004-05:00

Derek would have lost his job today if he had still been with Black & Decker. I am still reeling from the shock. 5 1/2 years of service with a Fortune 500 company, top in sales and the recipient of numerous awards- it wouldn't have mattered. 7 weeks ago he went to work for Covidien, a medical supply sales company. Derek has wanted to be in medical sales since the beginning of his career. Why in what seems to be the worst economy we've seen in our lifetime was he offered the chance to chase his dreams?

After the shock, come the tears of knowing that God CONTINUES to have his hand on this family. WHY US LORD? WE ARE SO UNWORTHY!

Derek told me on Memorial Day to be specific in my prayer requests to God. I've always prayed "His will"- trusting in the plan- being carried but not believing that I had the right to ask for the desires of my heart. That very day Audrey (sorority sister/friend/realtor) just happened to be outside walking in the morning and casually asked if we had thought about selling our house. 4 hours later I called her and said- let's do it. A week later it was on the market. Over the next 5 weeks I would get a job offer with a Company that I believe is changing the world one woman at a time; we would purchase 3 acres of land and we would sell our house. WHY US LORD??? Is it becuase our knuckles had gotten so white from the grip we had on our life that the only thing we had left to do was let go and let YOU?

Derek and I did not have glamorous upbringings. Broken homes, emotional turmoil. Derek comes from the most humble background of anyone I have ever known in my life. He is the only one in his family to ever go to college. To ever get away from his hometown. He started working at age 12- picking watermelons for a man who gave him a few cents per melon. He cleaned toilets at a hardware store through High School and he worked at a bank in a Wal-Mart when he graduated from college. I know that I do not deserve God's grace and blessings, but Derek...he just might.

WHY US LORD? Is it because we've given everything to you? Is it because we've made decisions based on what I hear You say to me despite the illogic of it all? If it all were gone tomorrow I would still stand in amazement and then fall at my Father's feet because I have seen Him. I have seen the work of the Lord. I have heard Him speak to me. If I never live another day, know that I was blessed. On Faith I prayed, on Faith I believed and God was Faithful enough to me to KEEP HIS PROMISES- Ask! Ask and it shall be done.

Dear friends, whatever burden you are carrying, whatever load you feel will fall unless you grab tight, I ask you to lay it down. Let it go. Pray to God and be specific because HE CARES! He does, I promise.

"When ye pray, believe." Mark 11:24 BELIEVE!

When there is a matter that requires definite prayer, pray till you BELIEVE God, until with feigned lips you can thank Him for the answer.

Tis better to walk by faith than sight, In this path of yours and mine;
And the pitch-black night, when there's no outer light
Is the time for faith to shine.

This pretty much says it all...

2009-01-01T12:29:00.000-05:00

The time is drawing near...

2008-12-13T15:53:00.003-05:00

We met with our builder today and finally things are looking up. We walked the property and made some decisions about location and which trees we will be able to save. Even though this preliminary process has taken a lot longer than we had anticipated, I think that the final outcome and price will be worth it. I am finally letting myself entertain the idea that we may be in our new home by May! This timeline sounds ambitious, but I know they are committed to building this as quickly as possible. I cannot wait to be able to post photos of turned up dirt on our lot!

Finally Friday

2008-12-12T21:40:00.002-05:00

I think this has been the longest week I've had in awhile. I am hoping that I can muster up enough energy finish my chocolate truffles for Sara's treat exchange tomorrow. As I type this it is 9:41 PM and my kids are STILL up! I am letting them get away with a little extra play time tonight.

So, I was on my way home from the grocery store, passing the Aquatic Center when I see a deer standing in front of me. There is a ditch to my right and an onward coming car to my left. I ease onto the breaks because I don't want them to lock up thinking "OK, this deer is gonna get out of the way, I just know it". Nope. I hit him Hard with the right front of my car. I've lived in Haberhsam County for 5 years and I truly cannot believe this is the first deer that I've hit- it was inevitable I guess.

I felt terrible of course- more for the deer than for my car. It was pretty scary and sad to know that I left a deer suffering on the side of the road. I got home and Derek surveyed the damage- my light is falling off, my bumper is broken and the right front panel of my will have to be replaced. There was blood too...that was the worst. I cannot get over feeling terrible for that sweet little animal that was frozen in fear as my car approached. He could have possibly survived the impact, but is, no doubt in pain.

Tomorrow is a busy day. Derek and I are going to church to get screened as bone marrow donors. There is a lady in our church that is in desperate need of a marrow donor, so all of the members of our church ages 18-60 have been asked to get tested. Oh, what I wouldn't give to be a match for her- or if not me though, then I pray that someone is.

After the screening, Derek is dropping me off at Sarah's and then taking the boys to Johnny Gunn's for haircuts. When they come back to get me, we are meeting our builder at our lot to stake out where our house is going to go. I know I haven't mentioned the house latley- it has been a loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong process that is a bit frustrating to talk about- just know that things are progressing (finally). Later on we are meeting my Dad, Step mom, brother and sister in Cumming at the Kani House for dinner. I imagine we will crash Saturday night. :-)

Well, if I have a stalker, now he or she knows where to find me tomorrow!! :-)

Christmas Came Early Today

2008-12-10T18:25:00.002-05:00

Since day one of my career at Initials, Inc., we have been designing the new Spring/Summer 2009 line. We've held conference calls, requested run-offs, approved samples, made changes, inspected fabric tuns, matched Pantones, etc. Well, today the bags finally arrived!! It was almost like the birth of a child (OK, we all know that childbirth is WAY more exciting, but work with me here). We have spent all of this time planning for this new line, designing each piece with care and consideration and making sure that it will all "fit" into the new catalog. It's pretty cool to see something come to fruition that you helped create. I wish I could show you the new designs & fabrics...March 1 seems like a long time away!

Britney and I went shopping today for all of our photo shoot props which is on Monday & Tuesday- bless the ladies who will be modeling for us in their best spring outfits in the middle of December. We've spent countless hours deciding which items will be on what pages, what props we will use, what copy will appear on the pages, etc. I feel like all of our hard work is beginning to pay off as we see this new line come to fruition. This truly is my "dream job" and I am thankful as ever to have it.

I have a friend...

2008-11-16T14:53:00.003-05:00

I have a friend who cries every time she talks about her children. She lives her life putting her kids in front of herself. She makes sure her daughter has Pumpkin Parties at school and packs the healthiest lunch I've ever seen for her children. I have a friend who never lets you cry alone. Empathetic.

I have a friend who's made dinner for my family when I've been sick. Who's taken my children when I've been weary and who unselfishly cheers on my every success. I have a friend who is brave and confident and I recently saw her become a mother for the very first time. I've spent my whole life wondering what a "friend" is...she is the definition of this kind of unselfish devotion. Devoted.

I have a friend who credits me with starting a ministry for young mothers but without her, none of it would have been possible. The day I met her she was caring for someone else's child on a daily basis for free. She has three children of her own. This friend is the sister I always wanted. She can take truth and honesty even when it hurts- and I take it just as well from her. This friend is in unimaginable pain right now and my heart feels like someone has a death grip on it- oh how I grieve for her. My friend will use this for God's glory- His alone. Magnificent.

I have a friend who lights up a room when she enters it. She spends her life much like I do, trying to balance life and work and motherhood. I tell you that there is no one I would rather leave my child with on his first day of preschool than her. She is genuine and loving and precious to me and all who know her. Genuine.

I have a friend who shys away from the spotlight. She is calm and funny and knows more about college football than I could ever hope to. She's the reliable one- the one that will always be there, no matter what. She knows you for a minute a day or a year or more and her devotion is the same. She has a quietness about her and a heart that I long to know better. Selfless.

I have a friend who would give you not just the shirt off of her back, but the earrings and the shoes to match. She's thoughtful and listens and catches the details of you that no one else will. She's is as reliable as sunset. Her heart is still mending from almost a year's worth of hurt- she heals by helping others. She is as neat and clean as I am messy, yet she'll still ride in my car and call me a friend. Loyal.

I have a new friend that has a contagious laugh. She is warm and kind and seems to be all about the fun in life even though she's had her share of pain. She's light and hilarious and shares her heart freely. Honest.

...oh how much fun was that? I've got lots more friends to share with you but the minutes in my day that I get to devote to blogging are almost up. I'll write more later...

Beach Photos

2008-11-09T19:33:00.006-05:00

We went to the beach this year with our friends James, Andrea & baby Andrew. I think we were all a bit apprehensive about what it would be like to be together 24/7 for a week straight- I mean, sure we love each other, but you never know what can happen when you spend hours on end with the same family. Well, our fears were completely unwarranted, because we ended up having the best vacation that I can ever remember. We all had so much fun together and despite 3 people under the age of 5, it was very relaxing too. Now, only true friends won't give you a hard time if you want to go to bed before 10- and Andrea and I were happy to doze off by then a night or two. It was just so nice to be able to be ourselves- no agenda or "plans"- just be and enjoy our children and each other's company. It was so relaxing, in fact, I didn't take a million pictures like I normally would, but below are the moments I managed to capture on film...

The house we stayed at had a chess table- this kept the boys busy for hours. What can I say, Derek and I breed geniuses!

Brit plans his next move.

Tate trying to explain to Britton why it really is fare that he is master of all the chess pieces.

Baby Andrew is excited about one of his favorite things....FOOD! He flaps his "wings" when he gets excited...it is so cute!

Stair steps

Not sure we want to know what's going on right here...

Tate being chased by Britton

You lookin' at me?

Andrew & James brave the icy water....brrrrrrrrrrr

Tate models his mama's glasses

Tate's pretending that he is solving a mystery with Scooby Doo by his side.

Beach Bound!

2008-10-10T07:16:00.002-05:00

Tomorrow we leave at 6AM for St. George Island in the panhandle of Florida. We've been looking forward to this trip for awhile- we've never been to the beach this late in the year so we are crossing our fingers, hoping the weather will be mild enough to enjoy the pool and ocean. Due to unforeseen circumstances, our trip will be cut in half- we'll be coming back home on Wednesday. The reason for us coming back is good, but unmentionable at this time.

Wordless Wednesday

2008-10-08T18:17:00.001-05:00

Read My Lipstick....

2008-09-29T09:56:00.002-05:00

Click Here to See More:

http://web.me.com/shrln/PalinPurses/All_About_Palin.html

This is dedicated to the one I love...

2008-09-26T07:58:00.003-05:00

Have I mentioned my husband lately? Why do I always neglect to give my life partner credit where credit is due? This week has been extremely busy at work and he has provided for my every childcare need! I love him. I love him. He is the best Daddy in the world to my boys- his true calling in life, I believe is to be a father. He is wonderful and tender and strong and the most driven person I know. Thank you, D for picking up my slack this week. I love you!!

Friday Nights In Habersham

2008-09-23T17:11:00.004-05:00

I grew up a Blue Devil, turned into a War Eagle for a few years and have ended up a Radier. This is how we spend our Friday Nights...

Update

2008-09-23T15:25:00.003-05:00

So, almost two months into the working mother world and still experiencing absolute JOY at work, cherishing PRECIOUS moments at home, but always fighting the guilt monster that lives under my bed. Something tells me that will never change.

At work we are in full swing with the Spring/Summer 2009 line. I am so excited about the new designs, fabrics and collections we are working on. Our business has grown by 500% compared to last year. In this economy, that is amazing! I am working on 2 different marking campaigns, connecting with new Creative Partners and constantly seeking new opportunities for growth. Every day is full and every day is fun!

At home, we've been relishing every daylight hour of cool weather. I love the fall!! We made our first attempt at camping on our lot this weekend. Unsuccessfully. Britton whined from the moment we opened the marshmallow bag til the moment we stumbled flashlight-less to the car at 9PM! Poor Tate was crushed, but spending an entire night in the company of a crabby 2-year old ain't my idea of fun! We promised Tate another adventure (sans Britton) in our 2 1/2 acre wood soon.

Derek is still having health issues. Please pray for him. He has seen every doctor and specialist under the Atlanta Sky and we are still no closer to an answer than we were a year ago. Whatever it is, my specific prayer is for him to be either healed or that we find out exactly what is wrong with him by November 1st. His job is going well, but has not been shielded from the economic mess the United States is in. I am THANKFUL that he even has a job at this point.

A drawing of our new home is in the hands of our builder and he is working out pricing. Now we wait.

I have two unspoken wonderful things that are going on in our life. Both to be revealed in due time...

Yearbook Yourself

2008-09-17T22:00:00.008-05:00

I just spent an embarrassing amount of time here.

Now, look what a lovely couple Derek and I would have made in 1952:

And then in 1970:

Bonding With Baby

2008-09-17T22:00:00.000-05:00

Blogging Disclaimer

2008-09-15T21:12:00.001-05:00

Faithful readers- please forgive me for how the appearance of my blog. I don't have time to fuss and fiddle over pictures and captions and making sure everything lines up...or is even legible! I am so frustrated with the blogger format for posting. I know the blogs a mess, but it will have to do for now.

"The Bestest Day I've Ever Had..."

2008-09-14T20:21:00.005-05:00

... is what Tate told me last week on our way home from the fair. This was our third trip to the annual Peachtree Fair that comes to Habersham County every September. Britton has never been old enough to go with us before, but we included him on this family-tradition of an adventure this year. We met the Garretts and part of the York family...it was fun to see their babies look at the lights and at us crazies who rode the rides.

As usual, we stopped off at the animals first and let the boys feed them. Tate was comfortable letting the goats eat out of his hand. Brit kept his distance and threw his cup of food into the goat cage. We came up to this odd looking creature and Brit started backing up in fear shouting "Lion! Lion!"

Derek, Tate, Brit and I got warmed up on the Ferris Wheel and then we let the boys ride a few rides. Some of the rides were a little intense for two little boys...they loved them though.

>

New Life, Continued

2008-09-06T20:46:00.005-05:00

As I mentioned in my previous post, week 1 of Working Motherhood went better than I could have imagined thanks to best friends and Derek.

Week 2 was another story...

Monday was the first day of Preschool for Tate and Brit. Derek and I went together to drop them off and my deep sadness almost knocked the breath out of me. Sad because I saw all of the little sweeties that I had taught the year before, sad because I saw all the ones I would have taught this year and sad because I saw the fear in the eyes of my babies who did not want to go to Preschool. The practical part of my brain had shut off (you know, the part that should have said "Even if you were still an at-home mom, Tate would still be starting Pre-K and a few days a week of preschool would be great for Britton"). Oh, no, I was in full throttle mother-guilt land. I lingered outside of each of their rooms until I was satisfied that they would survive the next 8 hours without me.

I went to work with a pit in my stomach- but through prayer and the reminder that I was still in His will, my day got better. At 4:59 I was out the door and then arrived at Sonya's in under the 8 minutes that it would take a responsible driver to get there.

Alas, they were fine! I was greeted by smiles and sunshine.

So, the days got easier, but the week nights were rough. Derek left on Monday and didn't return until Saturday night. I was a virtual single mother and I didn't fare well. Mind you, I am not one of those "Can't function without my husband" whiny, wives. I survived over 400 days without Derek while he was in pre-deployment, then Iraq. And baby Tate and I managed to make the best of life without Dad when Derek used to travel for weeks at a time early in our marriage. The combination of work, making lunches, boosting toddler's self confidence, fatigue, strong-willed children almost did me in. I try not to cry in front of my children, but I did shed a tear or two that week.

Tate says all Confucius-like at the dinner table weeks later at a large family gathering: "Sometimes mommies and daddies cry. Like mommy cried when I wouldn't get in the car to go to the restaurant." So much for my "got it all together" facade.

Fast forward to weeks 3 & 4...I couldn't be happier and neither could my husband & children. The job is everything I could have ever wanted and my kids are so happy at Preschool and "Mrs. Sonya's house". Every minute that I have with them, I cherish. I am teaching Tate to read and encouraging Britton as he learns his colors, shapes, etc. We are blessed beyond measure.

This is not to say that we do not have difficult days- don't we all. But all in all we are doing great- individually and as a family. I cannot wait to see what the rest of 2008 has in store...